Haz talks with Logo Daedalus | InfraredShow Stream

hey what's up man

hello

oh your mic's not working

[ __ ] what's up hey what's up

are you sure yeah it works now always no

what's up man um hey i got something for

you right off the bat

what's that

hello yeah yeah

hello can't hear you

i don't know what's going on

uh

oh wait there it is i got you can you

hear me yeah i can hear you like okay

okay cool i couldn't hear you but listen

man i brought something for you just off

of what you were saying right this is

one of my favorite things it's uh it's a

little uh very underrated bit of

american literature right but the first

thing edgar allan poe ever published was

a series of sonnets it's like again oh

yeah i know i know that one tamerlane

yeah yeah i know have you read the

original though because he put he

published the original version only in

50 copies most of which

the

other version

but i haven't i haven't fully read all

right i just want i want to read this

one for you it's the 15th on it in the

original version um so it's pretty it's

pretty good pretty relevant but uh look

round thee now on summer cond is she not

queen of earth her pride above all

cities

in her hand their destinies with all the

side of glory which the world hath known

stan she not proudly and alone and who

her sovereign timmer he whom the

astonished earth have seen with victory

on victory redoubling age and more i

weaned the jingi's yet raccoon fame and

yao yet now what was he

what a name

the sound of revelry by night comes or

me with the mingled voice of many with

abreast as light as if twere not the

dying hour

of one in whom they did rejoice as in a

leader happily power its venom secretly

imparts nothing have i with human hearts

because uh tamerlane right he sort of uh

comes to represent in the romantics this

sort of um like he kind of is equated

with napoleon and a lot of yes

yeah

no napoleon is um

you know you know who is that

who's that um

who is that the aristocratic woman i

think she's from the house of orleans

who hated napoleon

and what was her name

are you thinking of bathory i don't know

there's a lot of uh i'm not super

deep under friends

one of ezra calls her the the karen of

france

the french karen

she was very anglophilic she loved

britain she was very anglophilic

that's pretty it's pretty standard

that's something um like it's man dude

i don't know where to start there's so

much stuff i've [ __ ] uncovered since

last time i talked to you i've like put

together so many puzzle pieces you were

saying that like your uh patriotic

socialism arc has been kind of

instructive but uh i think that's always

true whenever you get mass scapegoated

that's when you're learning something

like you're like really on something and

uh you're gonna like learn something

from it is what i've discovered right

yeah i feel like we've both gone through

that quite a bit it's it's just a little

you always learn something it's just a

little bit awkward because it's like

is this isn't

like i never thought it was that big of

a deal you know but

here we are i guess oh no it's a big

deal no if it wasn't a big deal then it

wouldn't need to be said and saying it

wouldn't be such a you know wouldn't

garner this sort of response it actually

is a huge deal you know it's actually a

huge deal that this has like become a

massive uh kerfuffle over being like

like well it's so absurd but like they

interpret like what you're saying is

basically a kind of like they can't

really

uh distinguish between the institution

and like the the things that are being

represented or ostensibly represented in

that institution like

it's weird because they wouldn't say

this even if you're like let's say you

were like a black military vet and

you're like yeah i'm like a patriot and

i'm also a socialist like i'm a veteran

or whatever be like yeah cool based

whatever like do you think they'd really

be uh

as

as critical in in a weird sense no no

they wouldn't but it

i don't know it's like what i say

the only reason someone ever is going to

come and identify with marxism leninism

right now in the us

is that they just hate their the you

know they just hate the world they live

in and they just think it's a way out

you know they're like oh i hate ever i

hate america so much and i hate

everything it stands for us let me just

be the opposite of what i think

it's actually the same exact reason why

and it's like the same uh like thought

processes that happen

why all these like uh like post austrian

libertarians becoming neo-nazis or

whatever it's literally the same thing

it's just being like what do you think

is going to offend this people the most

and then it's like it's very much larpy

it always has been warped um for like

the last 50 years uh at least of uh when

it comes to like connections to um

being like the vanguard of like the

proletariat or whatever considering uh

yeah you can't really be that and be the

main construction like the emerging out

of the very people who like created the

conditions for world war one and world

war ii in the first place

well it doesn't really make sense the

thing that really um

bother you know

the way where i've been at and i don't i

don't expect to ever make this like

these dumb asses on twitter will never

understand this so i there's no point in

trying to

explain it to them but you and many

others get this is that

communism

in the 20th century was america that was

um that was fundamentally america right

i mean like uh you had these traditional

societies the soviet union

sorry russian empire china and communism

was like the

external

manifestation of what america was

and that's not necessarily a good thing

either because

communism represented the apocalypse of

modernity right um

these societies were facing just like

this complete leveling and you know this

complete kind of castration in the

psychoanalytic sense or whatever

just this uh complete

kind of alienation in a sense right

between people and their traditional

way of life this was the initial stage

of communism i i would say like for

example uh during the

uh war communism of the civil war and

then the very early stages of the

collectivization right not talking about

the long-term consequences but just the

beginning and then in china the great

leap forward these were all kind of

just

apocalyptic phenomena that they survived

and endured through

but

the unfolding of america is itself the

this revelation this sort of apocalypse

this is like how william blake sees it

uh as like the american revolution is

happening that sort of fire is what

spreads like the american revolution

um like the the ability for like people

to come out in this exact sort of way

was extremely radical and it's something

that's like downplayed by pedagog like

pedagogy in america now

you basically get this idea where they

first presented as being like oh it's

like super radical like when you're a

kid or something and you get like a

comic book version of it and in some

ways the comic book version is closer to

reality than the more quote unquote

nuanced interpretations you get later

where it's like well actually like you

know the british empire had gotten rid

of slavery and they were more

progressive so

uh this was just representing like

whatever landlord what i mean by like

apocalypse though is this just like so

with modernity right specifically the

english the original

modernity basically was this breakdown

of meaning in the world right it was

basically this like

um

look

for example modern science right oh this

is you invested so much meaning in the

idea of

genesis and creation well hey [ __ ] you

it turns out we came from monkeys or we

revolve around the sun we're not the

center of the universe like it's a form

of this kind of humiliating um

just disclosure of some kind of

meaninglessness right and where the kind

of satanism of modernity as i put it in

parent quotation marks comes in is

basically where it says this meaningless

uh humiliation of man's

senses and

sense of meaning in the world

is itself the metaphysical absolute that

exists for its own sake something is

only as true it's it's nick land's gnome

the g-n-o-n whatever you know the nature

the god of nature yeah it's just this

like fundamental alienation basically

right

um yeah yeah but so to me uh

the the way i've come to see it is that

the the british empire the sovereignty

the sovereign

rule of the british empire after the

glorious revolution

uh was the rule of this kind of nihil

right it's a sovereign kneel sovereign

nothingness

and to me

the american revolution was a way of uh

decapitating this sovereignty this crown

and finally opening up

uh

making uh

opening up mankind again to the kind of

ambiguity metaphysical ambiguity instead

of saying

the humiliation and radical alienation

of modernity is

itself existing for its own sake there

it's an ambiguity instead we don't know

what it means just this fundamental

ambiguity this is how i understand

pragmatism right with pragmatism it's

not they don't first begin with like

some loaded sense of meaning and then

you impose that on reality

um you begin with

an ambiguity well if it works it works

and what the implications that has for

meaning is open right but the issue the

reason america's such an evil country so

to speak

is because

even

the pragmat

this pragmatism itself

corresponding to each ruling class that

has consolidated in the history of the

us

it's turned into a sovereign object

right it's like

it's not only that if it works then it's

fine it's that

the only reality is what works there is

no means mentality exactly

i was just reading um this is like a big

gap between um uh if you read walter

littman and john dewey like their books

that were kind of polemical against each

other uh because john dewey has this

very john dewey is like a hegelian now

like he's like very uh erudite and uh

he's part of that sort of um like

transcendentalist uh like

post-transcendentalist uh kind of uh

look at the world in america uh he comes

from that school so you know he like

reads german idealism he's like that

whereas like lipman is very

in the like british utilitarian

tradition more so so uh when he's like

you know interpreting these things in

like a pragmatic sense or like saying

things that like you know everything in

the world is like a tool and like all of

man's creations are like tools like

we're creating these things you know

what i mean like that type of pragmatism

that has like a very uh that's well that

has a very that's like that's like a

maoist kind of conception also though

right where it's like where where you're

the proof of things is in their

continued social utility like if

something continued a practice that

continues to exist has some sort of

truth to it because it is maintains like

stability over time well the problem is

like with with people like lipman they

go um yeah but these things cannot

emerge from the people because the

people the masses they the things that

emerge from their minds like the systems

that they create are anarchy whereas the

elites we're the ones who can create

systems of order so what our job is to

do is to program these games effectively

or like tools like social conditions uh

social programs uh population control in

general and uh that's our job that's our

burden as like the elite we have to

create and like maintain order whereas

what dewey was more interested in was

saying that you we need to create a

system that is like um kind of like

uh order on a fractalized level so that

uh like the citizens themselves on an

individual level are creating like

participating in the construction of

order and the construction of

intelligence like actionable

intelligence uh in a republican you know

setting like you know that type of um

social organization

yeah you know the thing with though is

that um

the a really crucial difference though

between pragmatism and utilitarianism is

that

utilitarianism sees the ends as maybe i

would say the satisfaction of some kind

of goal or this

more i would say

satisfaction of some kind of senses

right this is how i used like to look at

it like the ultimate utilitarian example

is the british you know uh

kind of like capitalist who's use he's

using everything as a tool just to

satisfy some kind of like base pleasure

or some kind of something right but

with

with pragmatism this is how i put it in

my sub stack that's i didn't finish yet

but the basic idea is that

uh for the englishman the machine is a

tool to realize some ends right but for

the american the machine is the ants the

machine is itself the ultimate ends

so with pragmatism uh

work the things being able to work is

the privileged

um

is the privileged kind of uh

um how should i say expression of the

platonic good the good is

what works right

so

what that basically means is that when

it comes to the evil of america the evil

things we associate with

united states in america or

the unhappy consciousness of america so

to speak

is this kind of attempt to

arrive at a form of sovereign

objectivity with instead of the

empiricism of the british

occulted sovereign object of the senses

that is this metaphysical absolute this

sovereign objectivity is instead some

kind of thing that works completely

indifferent

completely uh

uh

completely alien to humanity and

completely

existing on its own terms right so

there's never we never arrive at this

reconciliation this harmony you could

say with a pragmatism pragmatism results

in uh well i guess i don't really know

on this level um

the way i've conceived it is it's

basically you just think of it like this

we got rid of the british crown

and then

we've been trying to replace and fill

the vacuum and also this is involving

the british elites as well directly but

every everything

every chapter of the class struggle in

the americas history is this attempt by

our ruling class

to replace the british crown so to speak

and institute

uh

make our pragmatic uh ambiguity into an

sovereign objectivity that exists for

itself

yes man is that that was uh what in new

england anyway the the

the puritans there uh they had already

replaced the crown like these were the

people who had executed the king in uh

the english civil war you know this like

they they had already uh taken this like

there was there's like an american

revolution before the american

revolution you know in a in that time

where you're talking about the glorious

revolution what that really did was set

the stage for the american revolution

because when they reorganized the

colonies afterwards which had been

effectively abandoned in the period of

the civil war uh

and like self-governing um they

reorganized things and they wanted to

impose leadership and direction from

london over these like previously

autonomous colonies um who were even

printing their own currency and things

like that um

so that was taken away and they were

subject again to the crown they weren't

subject to the crown for decades

yeah but um you're aware of the thesis

it forward in the book the the uh the

loyalists

the what is it the loyalist revolution

something like that

where

the

the uh

revolutionaries of the american

war of independence

actually began as loyalists and they

actually

came to realize this was my takeaway

that the current british crown were

usurpers they're not real

they're they're pretenders to the throne

they don't represent the real authentic

monarchy so

the whole

founding of the u.s republic was

basically like

not to safeguard against the excesses of

tyranny so to speak that just was from

feudalism or from the traditional

society but was a reaction to the

horrifying revelation of the fact that

how is there a pretender who's sitting

on the throne this is the only way we

can safeguard ourselves from uh

pretenders from ever sitting on the

throne again like and by pretenders

i basically am

meaning uh

like uh

like from the poems of the english

romantics like what's this poem uh

the um the mask of anarchy who is this

do you know aware of this poem

the mask of anarchy who is this by again

well the mask of anarchy was basically

like

how er

that the crown represented the like

exactly it's opposite the anarchy of

modernity and the complete usurping of

all tradition and rights and customs and

history or whatever like

the person's it's almost like the pope

right the pope is the highest

representative of christianity but then

with protestantism you have the

horrifying revelation that holy [ __ ] the

antichrist that's the antichrist right

so even the first time they realized

that though man that's not the first

time it's it's the same as uh from my

perspective it's the same

as how they viewed the

why the us republic was founded not as a

monarchy was because how could it be

possible that a usurper a false

pretender uh can be a king right

it's not that they rejected

the history of monarchy and all kings in

history as illegitimate and false it's

just that

here we have

an anarchist as king

so to speak

we have the mask of anarchy

so that's really

that's really uh what it is and like

that's like

uh that the divine right in a way kind

of leads directly to global imperial

anarchism or whatever like like who gets

this divine right it it then goes down

to whoever effectively can wield it i.e

like make their uh make like control

nature right this is uh this is where

gain your divine right is your ability

to uh exert power your will onto the

world that's like what anguishes like

divine right from an elected monarchy

right is a

is an elective monarchy you you you

don't wield these powers like

individually you've been vested with

them by the people but in a divine right

monarchy the people are irrelevant to

you like the people are

in are like good they're on a list like

they don't they don't invest you with

anything you are over them like you're a

god man this is like the ubermensch

right is to be the divine right monarch

yeah the strange

the thing that i always like to

emphasize though is that we typically

view

uh modernity so to speak i know this is

a loaded term and it's not

you know it's it's a lot of suits like

to use this word all modernity but just

it simplifies things right we like to

think of this idea as like first you

have

the old traditional society and then you

have the

modernistic progressive forces who have

no regard for tradition and no regard

for

um

history and they just decide to from

scratch

create a new society based on

this kind of rationalistic nihilism

whatever but we've

when my study of european history has

led me to a very very uh different

conclusion which is that

this

uh rationalistic nihilism whatever you

want to call it satanism whatever of

modernity that turns the world upside

down

this actually happened before the

revolutions first

there was some fundamental corruption of

the institution of monarchy

um

and of religion as well where you had

basically satanists become the pope

and you had um

completely way back buddy yeah how far

back you want to go right now

complete atheistic nihilists become

sitting on the throne they become the

king right

and revolutionaries

come to embody the true

um

return to tradition so to speak like

robespierre with his

um

republican virtue was an attempt to

return to some kind of authentic

tradition and it was actually the king

king louis uh 16th

who was the revolutionary in quotations

right so you have this very very

fundamental

it's it's a very like confusing

dialectic but it really does make it's a

very beautiful irony when you

come to realize like once once you have

once you can see it like in history like

uh then

it it just reverberates like everywhere

and it also like helps guide like your

ability to uh research better i think um

once you're like aware of these sorts of

tensions kind of replicating themselves

uh throughout time then you know what

what to look for and where to find it

like in any given like situation so you

find some you uncover some pretty

interesting stuff this way like if

you're looking at um like the uh peasant

revolts or like the sort of uh the

quote-unquote like her

heretical uh like uprisings of peasants

in like the dark ages and things like

this this uh this sort of like under

this like submerged history

has a this complete continuity to the

present um in a way that is actually

easier to connect

um philosophically than i think like the

quote unquote like ruling ideologies

development in time like the ruling

ideology is always kind of nonsensical

it's like uh it's like a

cabinet of um delusions that have been

gone through that's sort of like what

the nightmare of history is but the

truth amongst the people has always been

sort of um

that's the most lindy thing in the world

is uh is the people

yeah um

yeah i mean uh

to me the very very ability to

have a notion of the people

that's divorced from

the institution that's meant to

instantiate them

for me that begins with the

american revolution right

it's

just some kind of we the people and

there's a fundamental ambiguity so many

many people ask and they think they're

smart

right uh so who's her name luna oy you

know why

these people on twitter i beat with

she said she's just like oh you say the

people but which people do you mean the

trans people or

the marginalized or the disabled but

they miss the point that the people in

the united states the people exist the

ambiguity is imminent right it's it's

meant to be ambiguous it's meant not to

be loaded with any specific determinant

form because the minute you give it

determinate form you are interpolating a

subject through some kind of institution

has this this is like all the theology

to me though like this goes back to like

what combat and i have been obsessed

with which is uh the problem of

universals

in um

hermeneutics because it comes down to

like what the definition of the church

was right because you could say the same

thing where it's like we're doing this

for like christians and for the church

right and that's a huge amount of things

right if you're talking about like

christians

um or a church what is that is the

church the exact same church that like

the roman church the institutions the

ones that are subject to this that agree

to xyz specific charter the ones that

say this creed the ones that say this

like what are the what like how does

that develop like the church um the

universal church like basically there

was this conception amongst the radical

reformationists that there's always a

universal church which is not known to

people um in time like we do not know

who's a member of the universal church

uh but that this is a this is what the

church actually means is uh the

universal church hood of believers in

eternity not the any individual

instantiation of um like an institution

around us but a much larger like vaguer

like metaphysical concept like this for

the same it works the exact same way

with the people because if you say for

the people you don't even mean for just

the american people right because if

you're like an actual populist um then

doing things for your own people and

like like say like eliminating like the

american empire that you're also be in

the doing this in the best interest of

like those people actually uh there's no

conflict between self-development and

like uh mutual development like it's not

a winner take all game it's not one take

like to win someone else must lose in

this sort of thing but in a in a proper

like educational environment in this

sense like in the way dewey meant in

education uh everyone trying to manifest

their themselves like the best versions

of themselves they're tempering each

other also and like draw that sort of um

that competition this is like where the

positive sense of like the

competitiveness in america comes from is

this sense of

this is actually this actually makes

everyone better is that um

it's not uh it's not a zero-sum game and

you don't have to uh like divide

everything where it's like uh you know

you're playing a game and you see that's

people with xyz traits seem to excel at

a certain game and you go like oh this

game isn't fair to people with who don't

have xyz traits or whatever that's like

what they're doing when they're

dissolving the notion of the people like

they're eliminating uh the possibility

of having the pretense of like a

universality that may not prove itself

to be like universal and outputs but is

universal in inputs

yeah to me

we just i always like to return to what

i consider marx's monotheistic humanism

and the reason i think i say it's

monotheistic

thank you so much voidburn donating

love these discussions thank you so much

for having logo back on these streams

are amazing thank you voidburn

appreciate you but um

and the way you have to understand that

is that remarks what does marx mean by

man what does he mean by humanity

does he mean a humanity

uh loaded with certain predefined

characteristics and positive quality

what does he actually mean when he talks

about humanity and man right well marx

actually isn't referring remarks he says

if you want to know what humanity is

work right work for humanity and

work to discover you

but

productivity is is man like you could

say like this is what it means to say

man is the image of god i.e those

working in like productive like in the

reproduction of the world like like

using language and you know arts and and

uh buildings like that's what man is

well it's even deeper than that because

for marx there is no there's not even

any

there's no premise of man whatsoever

marx the word man just refers to

um

this monotheistic view that there is one

absolute there is one uh

kind of point point of the metaphysical

absolute in which all of this

developments of our thinking

specifically in the thinking of

philosophy all of this shares the same

essence and is one in the same

with um

with ourselves in our in with uh how

should i say

with

um

[Music]

with

our bases at its lowest base like for

example

uh the the most base and menial work of

a toilet this is part of one single

object all marx is basically saying in

terms of his humanism is that i don't

know what humanity means or what it is

but it does mean something and it is

actually something right so man just

refers to this fact man just

means to return the head

to its material base now what is that

material base what is the consequence

that what does that look like well marx

doesn't say this because that comes

after first you have to accept

that there is this reconciliation there

is one universal humanity

now again what this humanity looks like

and whatever is besides the point it's a

fundamental commitment to the fact that

even if you don't know

even if you don't know it

um a contradiction between heaven and

earth between head and body for example

is reconciled

as a material object

see see sometimes it's like i read marx

i think angles is better with this

honestly i'm like an angle's head right

now like i feel like marx gets too much

play i feel like engels was actually the

major partner in the relationship these

days but uh sometimes i'm reading mark

so i'm just like

it's like the stone that the builder

rejected here and it's like everything

he's saying is just like uh yeah like

that's why jesus christ existed you know

where it's like where it's like oh yeah

there is this like imminent absolute

which is like best represented by this

sort of a person who like works right

and uh and in working like discovers

this truth and in discovering this truth

is uh crucified by the capitalists of

the world essentially yes and uh like

it's literally like that's that's sort

of um that's sort of what angles is

getting to you at the end uh with his

like history early christianity and like

their constant comparisons between them

um i think really that so much uh so

much of the botched nature of like

western like western marxists and

leftovers is from this uh their failure

to like fully reconcile like um to uh

like a kind of like radical christianity

because um

it completely

like it completes their their vision and

it's already like implicit in a way and

what that ends up what ends up happening

like the reason why they didn't is

because christianity was actually

hegemonic like this sort of bourgeois

christianity of like uh metaphors of

like debt right uh this meta this uh

this sort of um calvinistic uh sense

where uh jesus gives you uh lower

interest rates on your loan to the

[ __ ] devil and like that's and then

when you pay off your debt you're in the

elect that's basically like the metaphor

of calvinism um

but

that is uh that's like as opposed to

like the great jubilee right of uh of

communism of a cornucopian communism

yeah you know the the issue really stems

from the fact that people don't first of

all people don't really appreciate that

marx and engels as they say shared one

mind so if angles were saying something

that seemed like it contradicts marx or

is different from marx

it's usually because the

interpretation of marx is not complete

right

but

when i really i just mean like the man

was around longer like you know yeah

yeah i think i think the issue is that

many people i think the more general

issue is philistinism and by

philistinism i mean um

it's this kind of relativization of

marxism to ju you know just some kind of

like

some part of a bigger division of labor

when marxism is supposed to be like this

privileged fundamentally like

renaissance man

type of

way of completely connecting the whole

division of labor into one

form of practice and one method and one

kind of relation to universal humanity

so the issue really is that there's a

lack of understanding of what religion

even is in the first place right there

is obviously the institution of religion

that existed at the time

but the more fundamental religious

extra foundation of religion

was something that marx and engels even

angles himself despite

his he was turning from this in his

later years

they took it for granted right they were

never confronted with any kind of um

challenge to this but yes christianity

uh

is not reducible to

philosophy so to speak it's not

confronted

they were confronted with sort of a

radical atheist like skeptics of the

time and who they were were like the

bourgeois socialists and the utopian

socialists who uh who go on to uh and

the anarchists who go on to uh produce

uh the system we have now so but the

curse the curse is that though that even

atheists are

in a sense christian in the west right

it's this more fundamental spiritual

texture

well what i would say is that there's

like so it depends on what you mean by

that because i would say that the

standard atheist cosmology is actually

just deism

like um is it fun like there's like if

you watch like neil degrasse neil

degrasse tyson cosmos or whatever

they'll even be like you know what we're

actually not even atheist because we're

like agnostics that we do believe that

there's the possibility of a deistic god

which is identical nature you have to

you have to look at it from the

perspective of the division of labor

they are

they they'll say these things right but

they're taking for granted this more

fundamental substantive texture of the

christian religion right as the real

foundation

so by rejecting christianity all they're

doing is estranging themselves from

having any kind of

active uh or

um

non-alienated relationship to their own

kind of uh

i guess i would call it uh religious

substance so to speak like i do agree

with marx with this sense that religion

is in a sense of the world our world is

itself religious right our world is it's

our civilization is itself in a way

christian

uh the question is whether one is if one

is a philistine then one is going to

occupy one narrow one-sided part of the

division of labor

and be blinded from the whole whereas if

one is a well-rounded kind of

renaissance man or whatever you're going

to ex you're going to really be able to

um

embrace this fact and could be able to

confront it and

be reconciled with it

yeah it's it's like a really unique

thing that um biblical literacy is like

almost non-existent it's like gone um

which is really kind of uh strange for

america it's an extremely strange thing

to happen to america for that sort of

literacy to to decline because uh it's

really founded um our obsession with

literacy was founded on uh biblical

literacy being something that was like

kind of necessary even to

uh having like troll over yourself in a

way like like this was like a means by

which to manifest yourself so uh to

yourself like ethically like the

experience of reading this text um is uh

is it

it's educated it creates a type of

relation to the world which is more

conducive to republican governance like

in the sense of a participatory uh

actual um like commonwealth uh you know

like the an unalienated like relation to

the uh productive

uh force of the worlds that's what the

the goal for uh these early settlements

was like they were communists like in

their time they uh they had their own

problems but like even in like the uh

the massachusetts bay colony the

original charter they do like a full uh

they go full communism there is no

private property and eventually they

start uh to legislate away from that but

that is uh this this notion is a you

know it's biblical the this notion of

communism that's where it comes from it

comes from

people reading uh

and interpreting the laws around

property and inheritance and uh usury

and you know these sorts of things from

the old testament

like leviticus and stuff like that like

this was uh this is where these ideas

come from

so what i want to bring up is speaking

of this is that

i've struggled with america still i

haven't completely completed the puzzle

i think i'm close but

it's a big problem for me and when i say

it's a big problem i mean it like this

so in china you have the communist party

of china and what that basically means

is that

the communist party is in power but

there is still this

historically partial kind of object

china which is not reducible the

communist party may be in power someone

else may be in power but china remains

there is this reality of china this

common point of objective

unity of the whole chinese people it's a

and the the coherent point that's the

quilting point of an entire civilization

same is true for russia same is true for

other countries the issue with united

states of course is that

we don't have that right so the

communist party of the united states

is a kind of very strange alchemical

mixture it's almost like you're saying

the communist party

of the communist state

it's like um

the issue is that

communism here let's just simplify it

means this kind of uh

negation of corresponding to the journey

so the communist china basically means

china experiences this fundamental

alienation abstract

negation of modernity and then it has

the negation of the negation where it is

returned to the original

object china china remains and survives

this so this is the dialectic

alchemical whatever formula but the

weird thing going on with the united

states that i struggle with is that

this is why i

i i introduced the idea of reviving the

cpusa in the first place it really comes

from exactly is this is the secret of

the whole thing to me i found it's very

poetic and i found something even if i

don't fully understand it very

uh prophetic even this idea of

the chickens coming home to roost and

the very source of communism and you

know what i mean by communism right this

abstract

leveling process of modernity communism

returns to its home and the full

consequences of what this

abstract negation quote unquote of

modernity what even is that

uh

it all of that becomes revealed here and

we have this fundamental internal

confrontation where america confronts

america but you it's like two negations

what do you get out of two negations

what do you get out of the communist

party of the communist state we don't

have the communist party of china or

russia anything else it's just the

united states the united states already

communist in a way from the very

beginning right so

what effectively effectively like doing

the whole like uh i don't um like there

has to be the creation of like some sort

of a party

to destroy all parties in a way because

uh what i think if you're saying like

things have to return etc um the real

return will be uh getting americans to

be actually more like [ __ ] americans

uh americans now like even patriotic

americans they're like patriots but

they're like and i love winston

churchill and margaret thatcher and hey

so it's like are you really patriots um

these

the americans are not actually being

american enough um they don't know or

care enough about our own traditions and

uh that that return will be the real

return because the goal of the american

republic was to not have parties at all

well my whole point

was that the the congress and the house

of representatives and these sorts of

bodies this was the party like the the

government was identical to the party

like there is one and it's one party and

it's all the people in the states

what my worry though is that

is

is america

only defined by this kind of um

negation of

in a way civilized like isn't america

only defined by this constant negation

of all stable traditions one like what

is our sovereign point of objectivity

for our country like what is really it's

defined by that negation i don't think

uh like in that sense um i i really

don't because uh america even in the um

like

if you're looking for a country that's

like a pure like or as close as possible

to that pure negation you'll find it in

like

sweden and like and london you know this

is uh this is the real place where uh

there's just uh what is the swedish

tradition do you like do you think do

you not feel that like the swedes in a

way are uh more abstract in this sense

like are the land of ikea like are they

not

actually further on this than we are

well the ins you know in a sense you can

say they are they're a hyper reflexive

society but still they have an object of

sweden sweden and its history and

sweden's civilization and there's

something there it just has to do with

their peculiar

perversion of uh in my view protestant

christianity in sweden that leads them

to the ikea

the ikea swedes that hover over the

world in this you know they're kind of

like space aliens right but

the the issue with the next project yeah

the issue to me is like

we here's here's how i put it is that we

don't have a common

we don't have a sovereign we don't have

a sovereign that

historically united american

civilization into one people

we are not yet one people here in the

united states that makes sense right

like

china for example that

had its various dynasties russia had its

ours europe had its kings

um

middle eastern whatever they have their

sultans or their emmers or whatever we

we um

we we like

uh how should i put it

um

[Music]

what was i gonna say [ __ ]

i mean because it's like who's lincoln

like that's what abraham lincoln was

like that's what

like a titanic figure and like why the

assassination of lincoln is like

like spells the rest of uh like the

tragedy of american history unfolding

after that and kind of the death of the

second republic um that link is trying

to uh

herald i guess i guess what i would try

to say is this is i read this in the

chat this is exactly what i mean we

don't have really a civilization here by

civilization here's what i mean

civilization as i would define it is

when you have both the state

you have some kind of harmony between a

state

and the material base outside the state

in the form of the people the people

in their

telerik you know earthly existence come

to an understanding with the state and

this mediation produces a civil society

right

but united states to me is it's pretty

much the like

it's it's the caricature of the

anti-communists that they make of like

communist countries it's like one

universal state

that has no regard

for the earthly reality of its people

and you know if you come into the

there's no like civil society here it's

just here's the state

and then chaos

you know what i mean

so

uh there's actually a mediating figure

in american literature there

the native americans

uh interesting elaborate

native americans are not like this idea

that like there was like anti-native

american racism or something like that

this base this like a purely uh like

eugenics like uh ethno anthropological

like you know rational uh disdain or

whatever is not the case at all because

uh the native americans uh were always

uh rep like they had they've had a huge

influence on the way uh we organized our

society here and they were always that

uh that that media mediating figure

because they were in the anarchy of

nature and uh the ambiguity was like

what is their form of order and if

you're saying like you were talking

about the mongols earlier right well

that's closer to like the what the

native american societies were like and

um

that was always that's always like like

from the beginning it was like how do we

merge with the native americans like how

do we become

uh one

thing like as americans that was uh

that's like the question that's like why

uh

you have like hiawatha hiawatha like

longfellow the longfellow poem like

these things they're like they're like

american republican things and you know

we have this sort of a civic mythology

in which the native american uh plays an

extremely important role in legitimizing

things as being from like authentically

from the land and the people which is

why like land back etc has been uh so

necessary by the ngo plex to uh you know

for them to monopolize that brand space

because uh like everyone kind of

authentically recognizes that the native

americans have like the most authentic

relation to this to this land but in a

sense like

the american communism would be to like

we all become native americans

that's actually very interesting

um

huh

like we are all the people like this

idea like we are i'm a native american

like my family's been here for god knows

how long like am i a native american

this is what the nativists were saying

right uh like uh the know-nothings and

things like that they would actually

describe themselves as native american

yeah and this was like a sort of this is

like a patriotic thing even like a

jingoistic chauvinistic thing in some

sense to claim yourself to be a native

american i mean you can see that [ __ ]

uh wocahontas does it uh elizabeth

warren but um i i mean it and i'm not

like in that sort of like cringe like

using it for like i was so oppressed and

status thing but more is like an

aspirational thing like peop that's like

also i think what uh is sort of wrong

like you know the uh the redskins or

whatever as the football team is being

considered as like a derogatory or

something no it's like it's like an

aspiring thing it's like these were

people that

that like america wanted to replicate in

a way like they appre they they uh it

wasn't this uh this like

uh like i don't know some aspects of

like a patriarchal or condescending

attitude towards the native americans

but

i don't know they're i think much deeper

like the american mythology um the

native americans are like they're not

always rep they're not represented as

like

usually as like reprehensible and like

below uh civilization but as like you

know uh a uh an admirable enemy you know

like as like a worthy foe

yeah i mean um

one of the other things i was thinking

about too was that

this is really the big issue is that

if

the whole united states as a project as

the opponents of uh

patriotism whatever

alleged was one big frankenstein monster

it's just one big mistake one big

catastrophe there's no substance to

america there's no

object of america it's one continuous

artificial creation that will never have

a civilization and will never have any

roots in the land it's one completely

failed

meaningless catastrophe

for me the question then is

is this not a fundamentally

nihilistic insight isn't that mean what

does that mean humanity as a whole

that's actually what really

kind of pushed me away from

my more anti-american stance i had like

a year ago which was not anti-american

in the woke sense but i was more i was

very skeptical of the idea of an

american

state i just didn't know right i was

like how could this be possible what

pushed me away from it was that

different

when i when i when i started to like see

what these people were filling the

vacuum with and it was just this rancid

utter nihilism i realized like hold on

okay

you you aren't at peace with america yet

do you still have to work america has

more up its sleeve because

you know you're beautiful america is

great like i love what i what i mean by

that is this like

yeah no i understand it's like what i

mean by this is like they they're

engaging in a kind of foreclosure

they're foreclosing the very source

of the ground of their own subjectivity

and then just declaring that they won

like oh yeah we defeated america no you

haven't defeated america you're still

you're still fundamentally relying on a

very narrow

part of america and

that's really our ruling class you're

taking that and their relationship to

the people as the foundation and you're

running away from the material basis of

what america is and you want to just you

want to seal the deal and be done with

it and close that off forever and my

perspective is no america has more up

its sleeve there's more

to this country

there's more to the the people of this

country than the institutions that claim

to represent them right so that has been

my point but the reason i don't like

being backed the reason i'm having such

trouble being backed into this corner by

twitter twitter lefties

is that

i still have a lot of doubt i still have

a lot of ambiguity where it's like i i

do always think like um

what really is the future then what does

this mean what is

like what is america i still don't even

really know right all i know is that

they're wrong that's all i know is that

these people are evil and wrong but

i would say this is what america is is

um america is uh like

it's they're not in charge of what

america is they are alienated from it

they're the furthest people from it

they're the most alienated from it they

couldn't see it if you gave it to them

if you showed it to them they wouldn't

tell you that's what it is they have no

appreciate like they have no like

they're not attached to this if anything

their uh their sense of self is like

mediated through the internet and it's

mostly mediated through um

like uh

relation to europe right and

specifically to northern europe and

specifically even more so they measure

everything compared essentially to

sweden right sweden do you know do you

know this when you look at like those

things where it's like human rights

watch like liberty meter etc and they

they do these metrics uh most of the

time they're just uh they're just

they're just

measuring how close you you are to

sweden

sweden will have the top marks

yeah

i know sweden is a big

it's a hell it's hell

right since the iron the triangle man

you don't understand like it's sweden

sweden is loki loki

has is

man i don't know where to start because

sweden sweden has this like incredible

occulted history of like hyperborean

intrigue being like the mediating figure

between the british empire and the

russian empire in like the baltic and uh

oh my god dude like it's [ __ ] i don't

know where to start with this stuff but

i don't know no one cares about swedish

history it's like once you see it and

you're like wait a minute the swedes

like the what like what is what is going

on there like what it what have they

been doing this whole time like why do

they give out the nobel prize like wait

they weren't involved in world war one

or world war ii like what what were they

doing like the whole time they made

money on both of those they built all

this i've never actually never had a war

they've never been invaded nothing's

ever happened to them they've they've

just only grown and like they're

invested in like everything they tried

to do colonialization but they couldn't

quite do it so all they did was invest

in every other uh colonial enterprises

like uh corporations so they made money

on everyone's imperialism the whole time

like it's incredible

yeah i i never thought about that

actually

they they're like the key masonic lodges

too it's [ __ ]

that's that's man greta thuneberg now

think about greta thunberg like why is

she around she's [ __ ] royalty

really

her fam oh man

jesus

yeah aristocracy intrigue the ancient

regime is not gone like like it's not

it's it's up in uh the this is like what

uh

what i've been realizing more and more

this is like the horror of uh you should

watch the show aries a-r-e-s

it's a uh dutch show about um this sort

of thing but it's like like

let's just think like a cthulian horror

that i experience is uh looking into

like things like like the swedes because

they're they have never had a revolution

there's never been a revolution in

sweden

that's true actually that's actually

true

there are 10 million they're not that

big though

because they what they it's a eugenic

society right like basically this is

like where this whole notion right of

like the sort of hyperborean

theosophical world view where like the

higher races are the ones closer to the

north pole gee i wonder who came up with

that um

it's that's where it all comes from man

and uh if you look at uh if you look at

europe and you imagine a sort of like

pyramid uh with the baltic liberating

you know like the the the eye of

providence sort of thing sweden fits

that sort of figure it's like right

there and their goal basically was for

sweden to be like the the select like

the cream of the crop of the hereditary

aristocracies that would then rule over

the lower races of like the germans you

know they weren't they're like no

they're like the germans they're they're

not they're not swedes uh they're

they're a little swarthy too but uh you

know that's uh that's

that's how it works because it's all

this relation to like the vikings the

vikings are another key i think the key

figure for western history especially in

the northwest like anglophone history

which we uh we don't appreciate is a how

you're talking about the mongols being

like um that sort of world historical

uh shift to modernity i was gonna say

the vikings are because the vikings

were just a pure like they uh they they

were the first they were like they're

all they're like a financial oligarchy

they were like a lump and proletariat

empire

yeah

they did play the role of nomads in

europe it seems like

rated they just raided things and they

they were the ones to really come up

with the the divine right of kings right

you know the the writer like this uh

conquest right um in uh like the dane

law and this sort of [ __ ]

yeah i mean um

yeah i i don't know i i never really

thought about um sweden or anything like

that but i'll keep that in mind that's

really interesting

but no but it's a big deal because they

they they uh they create the dialectics

that lead to like um our current uh like

the uh like this is uh this is a do you

ever hear of like michael heisman

mitchell heisman the guy he uh he uh

wrote suicide note

no with himself like

he this guy uh

he lived in cambridge he was like a grad

student

looks really smart guy wrote this like

thousand page uh book about the history

of the world uh and uh then uh killed

himself with like a copy of it uh in

harvard like on the square

i've read most of it but uh he goes

really deep into this but

the dialectics that existed in uh like

the early british isles right you first

have like the anglo-saxons invade like

these gaelic tribes and then you have

the the normans invade and then at that

point like so you have these gaelic

tribes now sort of identifying with the

anglo-saxons and they're like we're like

englishmen now right against like the

the norman yoke and uh this is the sort

of um beginning of uh like that trying

to like get back to the original state

of uh

like uh gaelic uh sort of a tribal uh

nomadic freedom

is uh sort of

baked that

ah that's

yeah i mean um

no yeah urban maoism has told me about

that he told me about the norman the

norman pill

so to speak

man you know more about french stuff

than i do i've realized just by talking

like i just know about the the french

school in the 20th century but that's

really it like france

um i know more french revolutionary

history than i do i'm not that

interested in it i i don't know why it

just doesn't interest me that much

really wow

i i do mainly because of the ideological

background like that's the beginning of

you know

the so-called left and

revolutions so to speak off right

but

just like i don't know there's a sense

i've always had like being an american i

guess i'm like like like old school

american where i'm like what does

[ __ ] europe have to do with me like i

don't give a [ __ ] about what they're

doing like i don't care uh i like want

like the whole point of america is to

like not give a [ __ ] about europe

anymore like we're doing our own thing

in my opinion right like it's so it

annoys it's always been perpetually

annoying to me when people are like take

like europe as like the model of a

sophistication because like i meet all

these europeans and they're just like

they're [ __ ] like college kid

americans they have like oh it's like

they're just like oh god it sucks

i want to ask you a question an american

now i um

i had a newfound interest in david lynch

for a few weeks before a week ago when i

realized my psychosis was reaching its

limit

but

um

to me david lynch is like one probably

the most important american artist

that's living right now beside in the

field of uh

film

he is to me quintessentially american

he's a pragmatic uh he represents

american pragmatism like

doesn't have to make sense it just has

to work right

what but what i mean i don't think

that's that true of his process actually

i think um he's actually like i think

that he portrays himself as like you

know working from intuitions and these

sorts of things but uh i don't believe

him for a second um i know i know that

trick and uh he is a very deep uh sim

like symbolist and he plans everything

meticulously in what he's doing

really is if yeah absolutely absolutely

absolutely um his his stuff he's very

much informed by uh some specific like

kind of like new thought like sort of

mystical stuff i mean you know that he's

like really involved in uh

transcendental meditation and stuff like

that but a lot of his uh his work comes

from reading these this sort of

literature of like uh the weird like the

weird like new agey sort of stuff in

america in california especially in uh

it's like the 60s and earlier i mean he

he deals a lot with like secret

societies and stuff like that he's not

like he knows what symbols he's using to

and deploying for like specific reasons

like like the in a twin peaks right it's

not like a coincidence that it's like

red curtains and like a checkerboard

floor like that is a masonic symbolism

you know he's from like a deep dense

like old school like masonic area in

california and [ __ ] too if i recall

correctly

i i can see that too um

his stuff scares his his

his twin peaks the return

especially that one um

i has profoundly scared me the most out

of anything i've ever

consumed media wise because its

proximity to dreams has like been a part

of my own

uh struggle with psychosis

in a sense like there's something that i

just feel is true about where it's

coming from that this is all a dream and

you know there's something wrong with

our reality so to speak right and i

remember from firewalk with me when it's

like

when um

philip jeffries you know what i'm

talking about when he walks into the fbi

station and uh cooper's looking on

camera to see him

and he walks past him and then they have

this really weird moment and then all of

a sudden he's gone right

and uh

but him and lynch remember him it's like

i relate to that a lot for some reason

because it's like

it's just this weird sense of deja vu i

don't know

something something can happen

and then not happen at the same time

that makes sense

didn't happen

you know what like things just disappear

like uh to end uh and no one will

believe you if you're like where did

that there was a thing here and now it's

gone

yeah it's uh jack from uh the perfume

nationalist uh always like to compare uh

the american reality to like a soap

opera in that way or like specifically i

think he talks about uh this one season

of uh

maybe dallas or something but it turns

out like the whole season is just a

dream and like everything that happened

in it is like retconned and it just like

disappears uh that type of uh that type

of like television uh pacing like the

narrat like where um the narrative right

the narrative that's being told in this

story has to make these sort of

indescribable uh jumps and leaps through

like a kind of like just

like

you just have to jump with it or not

there's no explanation and it's always

from like economic concerns or from like

concerns that are in these like

boardroom deals and that's the same with

like the story we tell in like the news

cycle where it's like yeah so we that

was a thing and it was real and we're

all talking about it but uh now we're

not because you know it's been ordered

that we don't talk about it but we act

as if we've all decided to not talk

about it anymore but it's been

disappeared on us it was taken away from

us so i i know that you strike me as

more of like very much

uh metaphysically

uh frugal i should say like you don't

like to

be very speculative or like make this

venture into this [ __ ] like

supernatural stuff but

in twin peaks uh and from other lynch's

work i can't help but get the feeling if

he really is

knee-deep in occultism and symbolism

right

um

is there a certain point where it's like

do these people really do believe in

some kind of

i don't know if i call it a supernatural

power but just a fundamentally different

view of how time and space work

and are they right it's it's just well i

mean you could if you say they're like

saying they're right uh gets you a lot

in this world there's it's a good

bargain to make uh to to with the devil

right the gods of this world uh you

gotta look for it you'll get riches

you'll get everything you know like so

are they right like because following

following you know their their path it

might bring you riches you know

out of it there's a lot to gain uh

materially but what is lost like

spiritually well i just mean to say like

from a pragmatic perspective like is

what they're doing does it work like are

they actually

experiencing reality something real in a

way that's

different from the rest of us like do

they do they have insight into some

supernatural reality we don't have no

no no no not at all

not couldn't cultivate like not that

it's b it's nothing nothing is like

they're not gaining anything like this

this notion that people get this sort of

a mystical gnostical like revelation of

like an outer realm like on dmt and blah

blah blah or whatever this is all

[ __ ] like nothing that they've

gotten or ever gleaned was isn't just

like found in a book somewhere uh

already written down and like already a

cliche uh even so uh yeah i don't think

that they they're tapped into the higher

order of things i think david lynch is a

great artist i think he's a great

formalist i think he's tapped into a lot

of uh that sort of um that underside of

america which is obviously like included

with his uh interest in like secret

societies and things like that that's a

big part of american history um and uh

he he shows off a lot of his knowledge

of this history like in his work um a

lot of people like critics who are less

literate in these things right they just

go like wow look how wacky and random

like these things are but like there's

nothing wacky and random david lynch has

ever done he's like meticulously

purposeful

huh um

that's interesting you know um

i don't know at a certain point where do

you begin to um

kind of like

dip do you depart from any like

scientific realism do you think

modern science has it all

under control so to speak or i think no

i think that we have like part of the

problem like what do you think would be

the most like speculative and daring

view of reality you have

most speculative and daring thing is

always to be a christian

like authentically like to actually

mean it like because you can say these

things like and uh they've sort of

become cliches and people say them

without really knowing what they mean

but um i really like i really do believe

in uh

in uh like i believe and uh it's not

it's not even like an intellectual like

um yeah like axiom or like a

presupposition or something like it's an

undeniable reality that uh

in my life um that i perceive like every

moment so

i can't

it's not

there's no separation to me between like

a like speculative see and uh the

reality like i think that like

authentically if you really engage with

the christian tradition and like the

hermeneutics of um of of like biblical

irony and like dialectics and like these

sorts of things that emerge from reading

the bible like over and over and over

again by so many people over generations

uh applies to like history so many

different levels of things uh just yield

so many insights in a way that like you

could just say uh this could be like the

first baptism you could say right where

you go like wow this method uh this sort

of thing is uh interesting and uh it

could be pragmatic and useful right and

like you can still have a sort of gap

from it but then the event i don't know

for me there was just like a few moments

of like an actual just like

[ __ ] perception that there was no gap

that like

you know like the

it's already like it's real like it's

not a preceptor like even like just a

small mere metaphor like a guide or you

know a model or whatever but it's like

identical to reality

so but even beyond for example history

and the understanding of human history

do you think when you say you're a

christian do you also

accept all of the kind of

let's just say

metaphysical

depth of that like for example that

um

there is

this has a consequence not just for our

world of discourse and meaning and

rationality and so on but it refers to

something outside like of inherent to

being itself like there's something

about nature

itself that is

correctly

um

understood by christianity

absolutely yeah yeah no i think that it

like accurately describes the world

interesting

yeah it might be saying my view is

pretty much the same like if science is

in contradiction with this

fundamental wisdom you derive from the

hermeneutic then science this is the not

the energy the enlightened enlightenment

tried to eliminate the category of uh of

revelation that has existed in like all

systems of conceptions of psychology and

like humanity for eternity really like

almost no one to deny the possibility or

the reality of revelation is something

that is very modern and um i almost

would like want to equate it to like the

great apostasy like pr pre-told in like

revelations itself that that this is

sort of like a true

like the rejection

of revelation and a rejection of like

truth in that real sense into um a world

of like satanic like satanic wills and

just energies

um

so

i don't know like uh what about

this christian view of satan do you

think that there's any reality to this

beyond like subjective experience or

whatever do you think there is a real

force of evil

i do think there is like a real evil in

the world and i do think that um it's a

it's manifest it's like it's something

it's a it actually is created by uh like

faith it's created by like what you

could like what like psychic energy like

people talk about like eager goers or

whatever if you read these sort of like

chaos magic type guys that uh nick land

and what not get into um like you know

thought bodies or you know body

uh bodies in the noah sphere or whatever

uh these sort of um transcendental

entities that aren't like visible but um

you can sort of uh feel acting in the

world i think this is true like this is

what like a corporation is too right

where it's like where is coca-cola but

like where it like where is like the

body of coca-cola like you know this

entity that uh that takes up so much

space and has its like tendrils

everywhere um i think this is a way of

seeing the world i think it's uh you

have to see sort of like in four

dimensions i guess to to see like the

tendrils of such things but like you

know i i do see in this way like i can

uh this is sort of um

i think with some people with the term

psycho geography and stuff in uh the 90s

2000s like uh if you have like a

a better knowledge of this sort of like

history and like you know the

development of a place and time your

relation to it like when i when i walk

around

um a city uh i can see things that other

people can't see and uh those things are

there even though they can't see them if

that makes sense

so like the

of like uh of evil in that sense in like

a kind of transcendental sense is real

even if people don't see it

um

interesting um

yeah i mean

so kind of shifting gears a little bit

what what are you so we've been seeing

the rise of this so-called marxism

leninism with woke characteristics

very recently and i think i've actually

converted a lot of people into that

religion myself

a lot of people who were liberals or

calling themselves anarchists have

suddenly become begun to identify as

marxist-leninists just to contrast

themselves to me right

because i brought out this primary

contradiction

um

what

yes great

yeah so what what do you think um

what do you think is the source of this

big [ __ ] going on

because i i struggle to understand it i

mean

there there's a lot of

you know i go on twitter and i just see

like a bunch of hate against me a lot

and i just

uh and i i know i see some of the hate

against you but we're talking here like

thousands and thousands of people so i

i'm struggling to understand like um

i don't know i i just feel disappointed

because

i don't know how to

i don't know how to be the thing that

they're making me into that they hate so

much it's like

even i don't even i a person who hates

them don't really think it's that deep

you know what i mean i i i struggle to

really be worthy of the hatred

they're giving me

it's like if anything you should just

take that as like you're actually uh do

doing something meaningful because uh

you know uh that's like there would be

no reaction if there was no uh

if there was in a truth

like basically the internet is kind of a

it's like a machine that's trying to

eliminate truth if you think about this

like all these people are uh they're on

there to enforce their uh group

collective psychosis

that they have developed together um and

uh like they create this sort of a comic

book world that uh that they keep alive

through their collective role playing

and larping right um and if you

go in there

the board over and you tell them that

like what they're they're playing a game

that like isn't real

um then they freak out and they don't

like that and they want you out of the

club because everyone there's larping

and like you're supposed to be in there

larping because that's what you're

supposed to do online so if you stop

larping um they'll people can tell uh

for instance let's look like kyle rayton

house right this happened all of the

like uh the the based in red pill the

like white nationals type guys or

whatever they're like this is our guy

where you know sonoran kyle he's going

in and he's like taking down the lower

races and uh you know he's presaging the

race war or whatever when we uh

resurrect glorious hyperborea and become

more like sweden um

and uh then he goes untucker and he's

like uh yeah i'm not racist uh i support

blm this had nothing to do with race

like i like at the end of the day the

kids shot three [ __ ] white anarchists

you know it's kind of funny um

and uh they were all disappointed like

and they're like i prayed for this kid

like he's dead to me now etc why is that

cause he broke

their play thing like they like he

didn't he didn't he stopped larping with

them

yeah i mean um

i don't know i just say [ __ ] america

burn it all down like you weren't

larping like you were being realistic

you were being pragmatic you were saying

like you can't actually like how could

you be a socialist without saying you

like love the people like the country

that you're in or whatever you know what

i mean like how how's that even possible

that's a true thing and that's something

that actually makes sense if you're

trying to do something in the world if

you're just trying to larp like you're

ruining everyone's fun so basically you

think all these people are just larping

and then i'm ruining the the game for

them yeah yeah it's just a game it's not

real their life

has like revolutionaries and then they

go and do whatever they normally do

it doesn't mean anything

um

yeah that's it's interesting

i mean um it literally means nothing

this thing that's going on with the

communist party is uh actually taking

off like the

joe sims is flying around the country

meeting with chapters

trying to like give speeches about me

and caleb and

we have them in a panic

they're extremely unlocked

because their handlers are like yeah we

don't do that

yeah i i want to know like how far can i

take this without getting the negative

attention of

their handlers like if they are really

being controlled by the government like

have i done something very dangerous

something i kind of worry about now you

know like

uh but uh

yeah

that's that's what's gonna happen look

at fred hampton what happened to fred

hampton like the what it what happens if

people actually do [ __ ]

in this country

this is why christianity man like what

is what does it mean like you think some

of the twitter stuff is artificial i

don't know that's something i was

wondering too like because it only

started happening

after

the party came

with me absolutely there's forums

there's tons of like accounts that exist

to you it's so weird why didn't do that

yeah no i just i know people the reason

i find it weird is like i can understand

if it happened once that i go viral with

thousands of tweets hating on me but i

see multiple tweets about me screen

shots of me like they get like get up to

10 000 likes consistently

after i started to be openly hostile

with the leadership of the cpusa it's a

really weird coincidence you know i have

no idea where that's coming from i

didn't even know that there was that

many

like marxist leninis in the us

you know like

i it's like how many of these people are

there you know

to continue

yeah it's it's not real man these things

are these things are controlled like the

internet the these uh these like little

tribes memetic tribes these things are

designed to be the replacement for what

used to be our insane asylum system i'm

not even kidding like that's what the

point is you got these people you got

mentally ill people you got them locked

down you keep them in these like corrals

you got them like living in this fantasy

world you keep the larp going and uh

then you can move mobilize them to do

various things this is something that

was done and studied cr this is like you

know it's a means of population control

it's rolled out across the entire

country and uh at this point you know i

don't think um the real the thing that i

think uh is happening to america right

now is that the uh the pr the people who

created these programs are like you know

the confluence of all of the different

people trying to create these program

propaganda programs and population

control programs is that they've all

come together and now they can't undo it

and they don't know how to make it stop

anymore so because it's not even being

productive for their own ends so i i do

think there's a lot of like authentic

hostility and hatred to me don't get me

wrong i'm not trying to

sweep that under the rug but

i just wonder like

thousands

of you know what i mean like that

that is that all real is that all like

actual people or is it bots

because i don't know 10 like 10

consistently thousands just like

wow that's you know i think i i know the

government's smart how they do that [ __ ]

where it's like something goes viral and

it's a feedback loop and then people

actually do become invested because they

think that there's something here behind

this but in reality it

it's nothing i mean

i i i again i didn't even know that

there was this many marxist leninists in

america i didn't even know that there's

like literally

you know

thousands of these people that are have

their attention on me you know that are

marxist leninist

simple but

there's not

but uh yeah

that's just how it is so so so is this

really like so the so the government has

taken note of me then and that this is

their response pretty much

too much but i feel like the government

has to do a way better job because

although it was really annoying to me

and it was this usa is bad bro the cpu

usa has been very cut out for like how

many [ __ ] decades like it's not a

real place it's not a real party it's

another one of these containment chains

like but i i really just want are those

people doing anything

but i wanna see one yeah but i wanna see

um

i wanna see how far i can take it though

you know like i wanna see uh

if like i wanna basically test the

waters i wanna know the exact limits you

know what i mean

um

of like how far this can actually be

taken at what point sh do i have to give

up right

because

the way the way that i think of it is

that before you exhaust the limit you

don't know what the limit is you know

you have to get there first sad

but um

i don't know it

just

i struggle to understand

why they are so popular on twitter but

nowhere else

that makes sense like why is it

i feel like it has to be at least

partially artificial i feel like this is

how i think about it psychologically

when we see why does twitter exist why

does it exist

no idea

yes

you're mike's kind of cutting out

twitter exists i have no idea no idea

the twitter why do any of these

corporations exist like how does

facebook exist like how do any of these

i know i know the background on facebook

but i don't know anything about twitter

the whole point was to format

revolutions in north africa by giving

all these people these phones so that

you could track all of their uh all of

their like social media posting and

things like that and then you could

direct those people with with people on

the ground and out because you have the

whole network topology of it

it's a surveillance

and it's also one for gathering data

that's why twitter is free

because you're giving away

and it's

their people are mapping it and they're

using these maps and when they end up

that's that's the whole point

yeah um

that's

like you

you like they can just that [ __ ] host

of antibodies out if uh you know that's

how it works like there's people

monitoring these things

i i feel like sometimes the government

does succeed in psychologically

manipulating me but only temporarily

like only for a day or two and then i

return back

so i kind of feel like i really want to

see like what is the best they have in

terms of their their side weapons

because i'm not really impressed by what

they're doing so far

it's not even that there has to be like

a directed thing it's that uh everyone

is uh deputized to do this if that makes

sense like like replicating the the

system's logic

um

just like on their own it like that like

it it's it's emergent in a way so you

have like you know there's because a lot

of those things are probably like uh

just like people acting uh as enforcers

right like why doesn't

there's there is an element to this

where

you know i understand they heard that a

bunch of individuals former heard and

then they're heard in terms has a

specific impression on individuals but

that's where you can have artificial

manipulation because um

when you if you're let's say you're just

some random guy right you don't really

assume the full force of power of being

a mob

first you see what the herd is saying

like let's say you open up youtube what

would you see you say contra points and

vows and destiny you're like oh those

are the people that

concentrate a bunch of attention on them

that's the other those are like that's

where it's happening i'm just some

random individual right who am i i feel

like it's the same thing like let's say

they just boosted these tweets to like

10 000

artificially

and

then you're just some random dude who

sees the tweet he's like oh it's got 10

000 likes let me give it a like you know

what i mean like that's how these

feedback mechanisms work

yeah no they do that that's why also

like they like um there's not an open

policy on these metrics like that it's

actually very occulted um and more so

over time like for instance like them

getting rid of the the appearance of

like dislikes or whatever because uh

government videos are getting all mass

downvoted and things like that because

that's that's also what happened to the

cpusa's videos their last two videos

were so downvoted to oblivion like and

their comments were just all hostile

and then i went and saw that the

dislikes were removed and i was like wow

this is

convenient

no the thing is is that

like you're representing what our system

is designed to destroy right that's

effectively what you want to do right

because you're saying you're you're

saying right like chinese china chinese

communism like better than here

yeah or like you know it has to be there

needs to be like a revolution

effectively um that you're and

you're not an anti-stalinist leftist

you're not uh you're not totally

reconcilable to the imf in the world

bank blah blah blah blah

you're not going to play ball with like

the normal electoral politics you don't

want to go in with the democrats or

whatever at least these i think that's

probably standing for right i think

that's i think that's probably why they

find me if they are even paying

attention to me the biggest threat

is i am really going all in on third

parties or a third a third party and

specifically i think it's going to be

the people's party right

but that's what i hope

that's what i want

that's the number one thing it doesn't

really matter you can be you can be

hyper anarchist you can be a [ __ ] uh

like uh anything a minor minor attracted

person advocate uh a narco transhumanist

who wants to eliminate um 90 percent of

the size besides the the minor thing

that's where i draw the line we don't

want any of those people

that's this is no i'm saying this even

that is totally reconcilable with the

system you know i mean like that person

yeah that person

what i meant was like in the eyes of the

system like all of these things are

perfect like you know that person fits

in actually pretty perfectly well that's

not even like a decision yeah i agree

that's actually the total yeah if you if

you're repeating back like the sort of

thing yeah dude i was i was gonna say i

was gonna be like yo dude

we can't have pedals in the people's

party come on

no no

no of course of course [ __ ] yeah i

mean like look we we can have

libertarians we can have right wingers

we can have

we can even have you know liberals we

can have progressives we can have anyone

but that that's where we think the most

important thing no i think the most

important thing is is actually just uh

uh like like for instance virginia right

i'm like obsessed with ethiopia right

now but ethiopian americans totally

swung the election in virginia by not

voting i heard about that they swung it

uh red because of biden's

my whole thing is i think that the

uniting thing should just be like

religion like basically because like

like basically like the problem with the

democrat the democrats are [ __ ] the

party of atheism that's what it is it's

the party of of meaninglessness it's of

cafeteria pick whatever you want who

[ __ ] cares and ultimately the only

religion it does uphold is satanism it's

constantly defending satanism constantly

defending the church of satan constantly

saying that like any sort of like

occultism is actually really cool and

based etc and like this is hyper

alienating to uh religious people

obviously right like what the [ __ ] duh

like why wouldn't it be like like if

you're if you believe in like the

reality of like these sort of nefarious

forces the people who worship them like

i don't know you're not gonna think that

they're like on your side right um

i think that's like why that's like why

i was drawn to the republicans anyway

like way earlier it had much more to do

with me realizing that like uh

that i like uh it was more of like a

spiritual thing like i was like the

democrats are [ __ ] like

the republicans are satanic in another

way but like the the average republican

is uh

they're just like uh they they have a

more like evangelical worldview where

they take um something like the

antichrist very seriously for instance

right and that's sort of like been a

rallying thing right it's like people

being like no i won't like i don't like

the i hate the antichrist right like

this meme um that is a that's not a

leftist meme right but it's also not

like a right-wing meme say right like

what is it

well you know

what i've been thinking about is that

america's evangelical or protestant

whatever

culture is

it has a very specific millenarianism

and a apocalypticism where the

apocalypse is always around the corner

but

apocalypse is not paradise apocalypse is

just this complete

arbitrary and almost meaningless just

annihilation

think about our fascination revelation

what what does it actually say in the

book of revelation what is the

apocalypse no idea but

it's it's

foreign said it was the most

revolutionary book in the bible

for americans though it's it's nuclear

armageddon right it's just this

thing that happens and our whole society

collapses and everything's gone

which means nothing none of it was even

meaningful in the first place at least

what it is is the renovation of the

world and fire right so the world like

and you could say this is what blake

carries it what the fire is

these uh like the revolutions that

spread um across the world

that is uh that is the this is the

christian apocalypse like we live in uh

these times like the only reason is on

fire americans put up

with

strip malls and our boring society and

all the dumb [ __ ] that we have in this

country mcdonald's whatever we only put

up with it

because we think there's going to be an

apocalypse that's going to

wipe away everything and and set

everything right right but it's not it's

not going to happen now it's going to

happen

later right it's going to happen it's

always something that's going to happen

but this is

what allows us to

pass that's the futurist

so there's different ways of

interpreting um revelation in the bible

right so what you're talking about that

would be the futurist uh interpretation

right where the apocalypse is this thing

but uh it's in the future it's a not

gonna be something i see it's not

something i have to live with or deal

with but it always has this like in the

future it always has this

sense of not immanence with an a but

imminence like it's it's just about to

happen it's just around the corner

and we have this anxiety that it's it's

just going to happen

soon

yeah yeah well that's that's sort of the

thing like if you have a futurist

interpretation of it then you have this

anxiety and you're trying uh this is

like where uh some christian theology

comes up with the conception of like the

restrainer or whatever where it's like

it's like it could

but

more of like the radical reformationist

flavor and i think that the apocalypse

is a good thing and that it's always

happening and uh we're in the middle of

it um and uh that's and we also know

where it ultimately ends

because if we're in the middle of it and

we know what that is then like we know

what the end is too and the end is uh

basically uh the triumph of uh the good

um in eternity right is a like uh the

world's reformed in fire and we have we

bring about

you know the new life

yeah um

i always like to say it's already

happened

we're in a post-apocalyptic society i

don't think so

well i like the idea that it's already

happened it's very hegelian to me you

know like uh that that's a that is that

is uh the interpretation that marx and

angles take too because that's a that's

what's called the preterist

interpretation and uh the preterist

interpretation is that this hat that all

the events in the book of revelation

have already happened and they described

like the reign of nero but that isn't

what

the evangelical or like the uh more

radical like anabaptist

hussites and these types of people

through history interpreted it yeah

because this because that same

interpretation like if you say it

happened in the past then the pope camp

isn't the antichrist ah

interesting

jesuits came up with these two readings

the futurist and the preterist reading

during the reformation as part of the

counter-reformation because they

couldn't actually contest with

protestant interpretation of revelation

uh

if it was a

unfolding event that was happening in

our own times and not something to be

put off into the future or had already

happened but what what what what room is

there then for reconciliation

like if it's always happening all the

time when does it end so to speak

at the end man in the last judgment man

today no one knows the day or the hour

when that is but we do know uh what

happens and uh we can uh see uh it

happening

reality is one continuous apocalypse

then

so that's the whole point

the point is uh is that the reality is

the apocalypse i.e like the unveiling or

the revelation the unveiling of um of

to himself through creation like we are

the uh we are the word of god like this

is the and it's a coherent uh expression

in in uh you know the entirety of time

or what do you think that can be kind of

reconciled with the the preterist view

in a way that for example

reality is one continuous apocalypse but

we can only ever experience it after

uh

after it um

it is after it

after it has disclosed itself in this

way it it it does

this the apocalypse is disclosed anew

it's not only one revelation it's many

revelations

across history

yeah but that's part of revelation in

fact like the thing is you just got to

read the book man like i don't know it's

a book that's unlike

another book

it's a uniquely it's a very singular

type of book

um and uh in its specificity of every

single wine and word choice you know

what i mean like um oh it's hard to have

a conversation about because it's like

actually very dense there's like a lot

of stuff that happens it's like a very

very dense sort of parable

so the um

the viewers of the pope as the

antichrist

um

so

what is your view of

does orthodoxy take it this far or is it

only protestantism where

it says this is sort of what the this is

sort of what the split was over because

the the orthodox they have like

patriarchs and things like this but uh

they do not um they do not like they

like i mean it depends on who you ask

they've been they and it's like the

orthodox church is also kind of uh

liberalized a lot i mean like all

churches have kind of um their their

ostentation to being an unbroken

tradition is kind of farcical they're

always reforming themselves and uh then

the protestants take the blame for being

like the reformers or whatever as if the

orthodox church is the same as it was in

the early days of christ or whatever but

uh they're they're more

ecumenical these days but way back in

the day oh yeah they would they called

the pope the antichrist all the [ __ ]

time

wow

um

so i really this is this is an

interesting thing right martin luther

for instance um there was an emissary

from the ethiopian orthodox church who

came to visit luther and uh he should

they shared like you know their things

and um the ethiopian orthodox guy said

that it was a perfectly fine church it

was an accord with orthodoxy so he was

sort of saying like in a way the

protestant reformation was a return to

tradition in the

sort of national orthodox churches

i've heard i've actually heard that

before

um that view i view it yeah yeah um

that's interesting like um

look at it right now like what is the

actual reigning catholic power we have a

catholic president the pope and the

rockefeller foundation are

indistinguishable um like this isn't

christianity like the cat that's not

what christianity is

the roman antichrist like obviously it's

so patently blatantly true

i don't know so unless other people

disagree but he one of the things that i

have to ask is uh

with roman paganism

is that a corruption from some kind of

original

uh monotheism because

christianity is the merger of

semitic religion right with the

indo-european

pantheon through the form of the roman

empire

so

if kind of in some ways yeah yeah it's

more complicated than that man it's

really a lot more complicated than that

as i've been discovering because um

that uh

it's it's not that simple because where

did where what is roman paganism like

what at what time like what does that

mean

yeah i just see it as the

the polytheism of the wrong you know the

roman religion

i i'm not that educated on they have

like they had like different type like

uh

veron was a lot like really

imagine rome just imagine like what is

america's religion that rome's like like

we're very very very similar um like

we're actually i i keep thinking about

how similar our times are to like the

times of christ uh in the sense of uh

you know roman empire was going through

a lot of the same um

turmoils that uh we we are um and uh

like their their religion is like you

know this is like like rome has like

transgender like imperial like you know

conquests and things like this like if

you wanna

we're unmuted

trans ally i respect all trans people

and uh everything about them and their

dreams and their happiness and i wish

nothing but the best for them oh is this

my fire alarm

[ __ ]

damn

what a weird

it's okay

his fire alarm's going off guys so i

just muted it

his wife was cooking

all right

okay are we back yeah we're back we're

back all right cool yeah my bad dude i

don't mean to get you in trouble for no

no

yeah whatever i don't i don't even care

like i'm like i'm like

beyonce yeah let's let's let's let's

just like uh get back to what we're

saying

yeah i was just saying like um where

what uh rome's like a really uh

what i was getting really interested in

recently was um like the like roman um

uh like tribune of the plebes and things

like this i think we need a tribune of

the plebes um that would be great that's

like what that's effectively what people

were trying to do with occupy was

effectively a tribune of the plebes

which was like creating a senate to like

elect like the people's representatives

to uh like kind of circumvent congress

this is a um this is a really uh

this is a very like uh how should i put

it

non-christian thing to say but i have to

play the satanic devil's advocate so i i

saw this theory once

that

the story of christianity was a a kind

of um

yeah this is a caesar's crime yeah

there's some parts of that there's some

parts of that which are like kind of

true in some parts that are not it's

actually um i've been really invested

spent years looking at uh the create the

uh the early early christian apocrypha

and the changes to

specific passages and gospels and like

letters epistles and like which things

are left out etc because there is this

like early um

civil war in the church over uh

where like it was going to go

you know and a big part of that was um

what's their family

it's a whole fam you've you've read the

book right so it's what is it it's not

diocletian is it [ __ ] what's the name

there's like a family that one of the

roman patriarchal families that were

like early christians and um

yeah and like you know there's like

people who think that they're connected

to paul and things like that i've gone

down like all the rabbit holes it's kind

of hard to tell um new testament uh

scholarship and this sort of stuff is

constantly in a flux because um we keep

finding more stuff and then it's like

people and it's like super political

right to like do um a sort of

reinterpretation with in light of like

new evidence or to try to pause

sort of a continuity of um

like who what parties were involved here

and writing which parts because like the

documentary record is fragmented and we

don't even have access to all of it

because there's so much [ __ ] the vatican

has

yeah i mean um i just find it very

strange how the martyrdom of caesar has

been so like under emphasized like that

was crazy how he was

he was he he was martyred

uh for being a champion of the people

and then

there was an entire

cult of caesar that was created after

uh the t his last name became the title

of the emperors of rome afterwards and

it's like i feel like the the mythology

of that

look what happened to that you know

that's like a really big story right i

know that there was shakespeare's julius

caesar and that's what

most people know

the story for but

it's so weird how that mythology has

just never

well it's because of caesarism came on

to like take this sort of uh sense of

like the way that uh the enlightenment

would read caesar is as a uh and

a uh as a despot who's appealing to um

like basically like the lumpens

uh to you know seize like arbitrary

power and uh like take people's

properties and things like this yeah

that's how they would have interpreted

it i was really

i was so sad when i saw

when i when i found out that um

rosa luxembourg used to operate under

the pen name junius

after brutus

right and i was like no yeah well

there's also a kind of civic mythology

in a way uh connecting um and kind of

conflating together in a way uh brutus

of troy with brutus um

helps kill caesar in uh the founding of

uh britain like as in like putin like

britain uh like brutus is uh one of the

ancestral like mythological uh figures

of uh the british and uh like there's a

lot of uh people who took like uh like

uh the roman republic that's the model

to go by and um yeah that was the

foundation that was the the neoclassical

myth was the return to wrong because

it's also like the huge influence of

like cicero on medieval uh pedagogy like

cicero has taken like it's kind of funny

uh compared to like what cicero is

actually like but

like

yeah he was a i i said he's like a hedge

fund guy because he really was he was

invested in all these like early uh like

trade corporations

um yeah cicero was kind of funny a

shitload you know well this is what's

funny is that it's because um you could

say that uh we can see this more now

when we read it where it's like well

obviously we like julius caesar but it's

because we're actually closer to like

rome than the than they were right yeah

so like they were reading these things

and they were like not like they didn't

even this is at the time where uh they

still didn't really under they didn't

really understand what a mass sport

spectacle would look like like what the

purpose of the coliseums was there's a

whole kind of mythology they had where

they interpreted like that they were

just like you know people like uh being

killed like on stage and things like

this and that's like all that they did

at the costumes there's like these

theaters of cruelty but like it's

probably much more like that they were

like carnivals which is what they're

called and that they had uh it wasn't

necessarily that the gladiators were

even uh killing each other maybe they

were like more like wwf guys you know

they're like professional fighters and

uh things like this and uh that like

this sort of mass sporting uh fandom

didn't exist in the times when uh people

were romanticizing the roman republic so

they couldn't even understand like what

the roman empire was like because we we

were we're actually closer to the empire

and the levels of like uh civic

infrastructure and like the size of the

empire and like the way uh the

administration and things work than uh

than uh you know these british people

were

yeah i mean um it's so weird how michael

parenti was the first to make the

connection between

caesar and

uh

you know like

i guess left-wing populism whatever and

i think the context was hugo chavez

right chavez was the caesar of our of

our time you know

he was the ultimate example of that like

you want to know who was julius caesar

just look at hugo chavez both were

latin speaking

so that's a good addition

um

but

yeah this whole thing is really uh

what's caesar's caesar's about the

forgiveness of deaths that's how he

gained his uh his meat like that's what

it was all about you know he uh he uh

ran on forgive forgiveness of debts

basically in pretty much all ways like

even when like you know he beat someone

he would uh forgive them and you know

he'd show uh and they would join him

showed uh benevolence this is uh

it to go you know there's no like the

sort of um the problem with like

internet politics so the way people do

this is uh they think that they need to

find a particular position uh kind of

abstractly and they'll hold that

position and they'll pull everyone to

that position somehow

but that's not really how it should work

like in a more like pragmatic sense you

go out and just start uh

you replace the existing order by

creating one that's better within the

one that exists so i think that's like

the real project like a third party

right if you want to do like a caesarism

you're not gonna do this

uh

in the in the structures that are laid

out for you you actually have to make i

i don't know if we can have a caesarism

in the u.s i think trump was probably

maybe in 2016 at least he was very close

to this

i guess you could i have like i mean i'm

just speculating here like coming up

with things but i thought of like uh the

notion of like um

uh elections ostensibly but they don't

do very good so what if we ran our own

election to elect a candidate but what

it was was this sort of uh like

tournament structure of people um

actually like debating like debating on

issues or whatever and we kind of like

outsource this to the people themselves

like create a more democratic electoral

system that actually reflects instead of

people um you know picking i mean you

need to decide the leader of the

people's party

tribune of the plebes

oh interesting

that's actually really yeah a tribunal

because then you're actually you're

actually building the authority of the

party and you're because of people are

participating in this like right and uh

this and like it's building the

intelligence of it too because you're

seeing like what is like the most uh

soluble platform that could like attract

come to think of it i don't know why

people didn't make the connection to

caesarism more in the beginning because

if you think about it

the whole concept of the proletariat was

this kind of like

uh it was a kind of teasing

there's a kind of like

challenge to

the neoclassical roman citizen as like

this model of republican virtue who are

saying oh you're talking about the

citizen the french citizen of the

universal republic whatever

well just like in ancient rome the

citizen too becomes divided and that's

that's the primary contradiction we have

the universal citizen sure classes are

eliminated formally but now we have the

proletarians and and so on and so on

but

it's all about the land

of the roman proletariat precipitates

the end of the republic and i i think

you can reread that and say

the existence of the proletariat

precipitates the end of the bourgeois

uh formal state and its ablation

into some kind of empire right

but

not empire in this in the bad sense but

just in the sense of like

uh a return to like a rule that is

legitimated by

something more than just the form of the

state itself

yeah i mean like that i just

i don't think uh the way people are

playing the politics game or at least

the millennials i feel like as a

generation millennials have like almost

learned nothing about how to play the

politics game and um

i like

really it's like it's almost like i

can't even make the first step because i

don't even know what planet i'm on most

of the time i just like people are

tweeting at me oh you're a choppiness

it's like wait are we still doing this

like

i i left you guys in like 2015

and i went my own way and i came back

and they haven't changed it's like

really that's

we're still doing this

we still are um people are going to keep

doing it unless we're still doing

something better this like weird thing

where people are just like

oh you're a racist and you're it's like

dude

have you not matured this whole time

nothing happened nothing changed

i thought i thought we would we would

have gotten to a point by now where it's

like okay can we actually talk about

real the real world

we're still talking about

our little bubble and how pure you are

within the bubble and whatever like i

don't know it's

i just think no one grew up

since i left them you know

i i can't hear

you i don't know what's going on

nope uh sorry i can't hear you

can't hear anything

yes it's the input

the problem with the input settings

my electronics get [ __ ] all the time i

don't know what's going on but uh that's

why i am i'm scared to move beyond the

yeti mic the usb mic because it's like

yeah it just seems very complicated

but yeah i think my cat unplugged a

thing but whatever

anyway i i what i was saying is uh i

think uh if i recall correctly um is a

like i don't feel like millennials like

have learned the politics game this

isn't really that like real to them

um i feel like the like everyone and

it's like part of like the reason why it

can keep going is because people are

like basically addicted to pornography

in like mental pornography or like you

know video game um like feedback reward

systems like loot crate [ __ ] nfts uh

cryptocurrency like the notion that like

you know you're gonna speculate and like

uh make the you're gonna be the big

influencer and get famous and like then

you won't have to worry about any of

these things anymore

that all of that

is the problem it's like like it's a

we're like a smut adult civilization

like uh it's really like the opium

epidemic it's not even just opium it's

like just like a complete uh

uh

try to escape from uh

uh acknowledging the reality of the

world i always i'm a very i don't know

like say i'm an empathetic person but i

do always put myself in the head of my

enemies and just be like how could you

live like this i want to see how they

live with

how do they get by with this way of

thinking

and i always struggle to be like how

how could i imagine myself being one of

them like somebody who's

always you know virtue signaling and

talking about like

here is the bullet points of why ha ha

is a

misogynist racist uh

i don't know

reactionary firstly he is completely

against the movement it's like these i

feel like they get this pleasure from

using these words like they're like

participating in some kind of like

social

reality and they're addressing this

they're moving up they're moving up in

the sort of like occulted hierarchy of

like this like this little lodge um by

like repeating the dogmas or whatever

it's not a it's not real communication

it's not communicating um what you think

it's communicating if that makes sense

like it's a the content

is uh

entirely meaningless like the charges

but it's like it's like it it just every

time i try to put myself in their head i

just get this sick feeling in my stomach

how the [ __ ] could you live like this

you know what i mean they're miserable

they're all miserable they all hate

themselves they have to be really

miserable oh my god oh so goddammit

damn

this fire alarm because uh it's just

this weird apartment

god anytime you cook anything it goes

off

yeah i mean um

yeah i don't know it's

uh

i i i have empathy for them but uh they

uh they embrace their own misery like

they create their uh like this is why

like uh i think christian uh ethics and

uh hermeneutics are interesting because

um it's like uh swedenburg would say

this too

people choose to go to hell and some

people enjoy uh being in hell there's

some people who enjoy like inflicting

pain on themselves well here's the thing

i would understand if there's stakes

like let's say there's a real movement

and struggle that's made real

achievements

then i would get it because you're it's

a mat it's there's actually something at

stake like you you're they're being this

dogmatic

and disemotional because like they're

they don't want to lose

you know their position and they don't

want to lose

their their part it's there's some real

world reality to it where it's like yeah

we can't risk it but what i'm trying to

think is like

why are people so close-minded and

dogmatic about everything

they're trained to be that way but but

what is it for because it's not like

they're

part of some political movement that's

gotten anywhere in the real world so

it's like what do you really have to

lose by just being a little bit more

open-minded i don't know

um

what do they have to lose uh like

basically if you embed yourself in one

of these like societies of like mutual

scapegoating and whatnot what you have

to lose is uh now you're getting all

everything that you've doled out

all the time you've been in there it's

gonna come down to you

bro every time you went out and you like

canceled and you like rode up and you

went you were surveilling people and

like you know writing up all their lists

of sins before of bad sentiments and bad

ideology and you wrote them up and you

tried to get them crucified in the

public stage that'll happen to you as

soon as you realize what you've done and

you've tried to like change it'll all

come back to you and that's and they

know that they're all afraid of doing it

i've seen it like it's the same on the

right too ironically like all of these

people aren't actually as racist as they

pretend to be and all these other things

and uh

if you meet any of them in real life

they're they're uh not like that at all

it's uh they they're playing this game

and their status in this game is

determined by um

like finding like that right pose to fit

right so that like it like the based

pose or like in the left version would

be the uh the most ethically good one in

the right one it's almost the most uh

ethically uh

nihilistic in a way yeah like the

morning

and i've said this before the reason is

because the right

is is trying to define itself in america

as a form of total resistance against uh

the discursive tyranny of the left so

they'll do anything they can to prove

how much

they don't care a virtue signal to

anyone whatever but the issue that i

find with that is that there's a lot of

people

who just so happen to

at the same time be completely socially

ostracized and canceled they're also

scumbags like pedals think about pedals

right like at what point at what point

does being a pedal become based just

because you're

defying the discourse so you have to be

very careful right it's not everything

that the discourse

uh is against

is good it's just that

you can have other reasons for not

liking things you know what i mean like

you can still be against pedos without

being a virtue signal or for the

discourse that makes sense you know yeah

yeah yeah well it's also like the irony

there is like okay cool let's shut down

4chan and it's like yeah

okay start there like like just turn it

off make it go away

um yeah yeah we're going to do that

you're quiet it's just because you know

this is a thing is that the pedal [ __ ]

is becoming normalized on the left it's

becoming it was already

this is a part of like the last thing on

the 60s

yeah yeah that's true but for a long

time

uh

you know they the left pretended to be

against it or whatever but now they're

starting to be like oh let's have

empathy

and the first

so i don't know if they're they're

actually gonna start saying children are

awful are

are not protected anymore but they're

going to start by saying oh let's

let's treat them the

this genuine sexual orientation with

uh with like artificial pornography and

robots like vaush said or whatever and

that's completely fine because no

children are involved but you know

that's

you know what it all all it is all

they're saying like what vosh is saying

there is that uh in japan right now

basically they already have their

paradise for what they're looking for

right like you can get all that

pornography and um uh in a video game

form or you know peripheral like sex

toys or whatever the [ __ ]

they just don't give a [ __ ] there their

real problem is that there's just still

like the last residual remnants of like

a christian like blue law regarding like

this type of thing in the marketplace

not being allowed to be sold like all

they all they really care about is like

just maximal um

consumption of uh like you know like

that sort of [ __ ] that's it like that's

all it means

yeah that's

that's that's what i mean when it's like

when someone like vaush is saying that

like he is defending like hentai i think

that's going to be the source of the

conservative revolution on the left and

i think i might benefit from it a lot

which is that

as soon as so look right now the left

has this idea

in america which is like anything that

is part of the discourse and looks like

it's part of the progress of society is

good and then if you're opposed to that

you're a reactionary well

as soon as people start bringing up the

nuance of you know pedos and how that

that's just a sexual orientation it's

not their fault this is going to

increasingly become discursively

relevant and people are going to be

forced to draw red lines and drawing a

red line is the first step to being able

to confront the modern progress in

general

and i i just wonder how are you gonna

how are these

lefties opposed to me calling me a

reaction how are they gonna draw a red

line like what's what's the basis of

your red line because you know

how are you gonna maintain this idea

that you're a part of some kind of like

real

progress of going forward in history

and at the same time just be like you

know what this is my red line i don't

care how irrational i seem

uh [ __ ] that [ __ ] it's not happening

right that's gonna be their gateway drug

to like uh

taking my pill i i hope

you know yeah you would hope but maybe

uh

i don't know man i don't really know uh

that's a that's placing bets on uh

on a human nature that i might not

necessarily on uh or at least uh

one uh that is uh defined in opposition

to uh revelation you could say uh would

uh go towards because the norm in human

history is closer to like what they're

trying to create and the as uh like

camille do you see those uh things i

retweeted from uh about camille paglia

like all her uh defenses of nambala and

things like that over the years yeah i i

i know about that that's why i hate i

hate camila

whatever i the thing is is like she's

she's okay like when she's writing about

some some things like i've read a lot of

her stuff um but you know she was like

an acolyte of bloom who was like an

acolyte of fry and like fries really

much better than all of them so you know

that's how i see it but she was saying

you know in there right like you know

it's really just these abrahamic faiths

that have this quirk or whatever yeah

she's against uh man boy love

she's a big like uh nietzschean she

loves the nietzsche and dionysian

paganism they've already accepted it

though what what like was that movie

they had a whole movie uh what is it i

haven't seen it um but it's uh call me

by call me by your name i think that's

what it's called right isn't it about

like a man uh

with like an underage boy that's like a

relationship huh no i've never heard of

that

it's it was a it was a very popular

movie um this this was like before the

cuties debacle even and it's kind of

ironic because it didn't get as much as

the outro even though it's like kind of

more blatantly uh

uh pro uh pedophilic or pro uh

petterastic in this sense and the cuties

movie which was actually kind of trying

to be critical

jesus

what the hell

that's not that's not that that's not

new though this is aristocratic morality

this is british this is almost like the

height of britishness is uh like this

oscar wilde type stuff um this is a it's

kind of a part of the progressive

tradition in that sense because they

were going against like these

anti-sodomy laws or whatever in britain

and um

this was like kind of uh conflated in

there and in fact if you go all the way

back you can read bentham uh talking

about uh the uh legalization of

patarasti in um one of his uh one of his

rights here's the thing is that without

venturing too much in this territory

don't you think that the lefties are

gonna be forced with a lot of arguments

where it's like by trying to draw a red

line when it comes to that they're gonna

be like oh you're you seemed like just

like the reactionaries in the 80s and

90s when it came to other minorities

and whatever like you're you're just

right you sound just like a reactionary

with regards like how are they gonna

like deal with that you know like how

are they gonna

be like no this one's different

like what is their justification going

to be

well i don't that's what i think is that

my hypothesis is that they're going to

have a complete existential crisis

because

they don't have any red lines right now

but they're going to need to discover

one unless they're

unless the left wants to eventually

accept

like pedal [ __ ] and bestiality they're

gonna have to discover something i think

they do

i think that's what most leftists are

like though like quote unquote leftists

on the internet like the radical

leftists like the ultra leftists or

whatever they're like furries they're

like people who live on it

they're like deviant art people they're

like uh they're uh

a deep dark dank part of internet

pornography you know that is uh that's

where it all comes from like it's

concentric with those places yeah you

would not have and we don't want to be

discriminatory against anyone remember

twitch but

you would not believe how much uh i

don't know much about the furry movement

so you know whatever but

you would not know how much furries have

been on my back on twitter like i get

attacked by them like almost every day

they're the vanguard they're the

vanguard party man they're the vanguard

party because they're the ones who want

to upload themselves into and like have

an avid a digital avatar in the

metaverse actually this is like

something uh one of the guys um who's

like working on metaverse stuff or

whatever had to write like a post being

like uh like addressing like how many

furries were emailing him like excitedly

about uh some one of these like

neurolink technology sort of things

these are the people they they want to

live in uh in the internet

yeah where they can be anything and they

can have sex with anything or whatever

oh

man i

you know

i can't imagine people who have to just

spend are you a person who gets to spend

a lot of time alone or just maybe just

with your wife like not with crowds

pretty much like all the time that yeah

that's what i'm trying to say is like

i can't imagine what it'd be like to be

a person who never i feel like privacy

is our only salvation in this in this

age like our ability to just be alone

is the biggest grace and blessing we can

have because being forced to be

socialized with all these people or

whatever it's like i could not do it i i

don't have the i think i think uh

socializing that way is kind of

anti-social in uh this day and age if

that makes sense oh it is but like when

you're trapped in being forced to be

around these people uh these lefties or

whatever have fun man i have so much fun

when it happens to me i don't know but

imagine i don't i feel like you take

your privacy for granted because imagine

if that's your whole life you're just

always around them

always

that's what it was like when i went to

college i guess uh so i kind of i kind

of remember and what i did was i just

spent a lot of time on my own you know

reading but in some ways uh this is why

i've like been really interested in uh

uh

thomas the great saying uh no saint

anthony the great what am i saying uh

saint anthony the great the hermit the

great uh desert father um because i feel

like that's sort of um what uh it's like

that that's the salvation you find um

you know this day and age like he's the

one who's like constantly harangued by

demons if you look up like paintings of

him like they're like

and i always look like that's me on

twitter like that's what i feel like

there's all these things like attacking

me and like holding on to me and i just

have to uh

it's weird uh because it's it's kind of

seems like it'd be anti-social to like

embrace solitude in a way but i think

that it's um

paradoxically extremely pro-social in

the sense

positively well i can i can talk to

people as human beings very easily but

i always tell this to my chat is that i

cannot talk to cctv cameras

people who just never know how to turn

off their their discourse their stream

of discourse

and you just give them riddles man it's

fun

yeah i don't know it's it's just tough

for me to like yeah you uh i feel like

uh

yeah you have a you're more uh

investment in your uh

public image i feel

than um

and i have

yeah i kind of enjoy i don't really care

like i kind of enjoy when a bunch of

people are upset at me like i think it's

funny so like i don't like

so

so like in the same situations though

like if i'm surrounded by those sorts of

people i just have fun i have so much

fun asking them questions and like you

know just like like getting like just

like moving them around just it's fun

yeah i don't know it's like um

i i felt physically sick for like three

days after being on twitter i took a

break from twitter and then

i felt so much better just taking a

break and i was like what the hell was i

doing i felt like i blacked out

and it was just

i i got trapped on twitter

just cause i've done that like i i uh

because i feel like i got gaslighted i

gaslighted myself like what the [ __ ]

like

this has nothing to do with

where my train of thought was like a

week ago what the [ __ ] happened

yeah i mean uh

it happens man um i've i've had a i feel

like uh

sometimes it's like uh when that sort of

thing happens it's like uh you have to

it's like you it you kind of it's not

like you're asking for it or you deserve

it but uh there is something like um

that you have to learn from it because

uh nothing like that garner the only

thing that just still kind of has me a

little shook is like thousands where did

the thousands come from i get it if

there's like hundreds but like

10 000 people uh

on my back really important it because

no one had articulated to any sort of

audience at all um a position that

socialists should be patriotic

i.e

and uh not um kind of like

anti-patriotic or seeking to kind of um

uh erase the uh history of america as

like a kind of blight upon what would i

find hilarious is that the way they cope

when you respond they're like well the

only reason other countries are

marx atlantis countries are patriotic is

because

that's only in so far as they're victims

of imperialism but otherwise they

wouldn't be patriotic

and what i have to tell those people is

that

um

that's such a condescending like

stupid view because you realize these

people these people aren't part of your

university i know in your university

people leverage their identities to get

ahead for their careers and they're

making it seem like entire states are

leveraging

their poc identity to get ahead right or

to virtu that's not how it works when

they say that they're patriots

it's not because they're oppressed

they're genuinely people who love their

country and love

you know their history and their people

and like it's not just it's not as it's

not a way of saying oh i'm a i'm

oppressed and i want you know

i want you to it's it comes from like an

alienation with their own history though

too because like a lot of the times like

the people who are most vocally like

anti um or like like they're a kind of

lack of interest in the history of

america because it's more complicated

that's one of the things that bothers me

right where it's like do i get to be

offended when people make like uh you

know these like wide generalizations and

stereotypes of like

uh the type like what uh the early

american people were like and like what

they believed and you know like what

their goals were and like what they were

trying to do and like how they viewed

the world because people have a totally

skewed conception of like all of this

and it's like you don't have like a kind

of uh not a relativistic one but a kind

of a sense of the proportion of things

in history so it's like okay you're

saying america is like reactionary or

like bourgeois revolution blah blah blah

but it's like what was better at the

time like at the exact same time like

what society you're going to point to

like that's like the context required to

like appreciate any of these it's the

british empire

yeah

do you know you do you think you also

agree that they're probably going to

prepare meghan markle

oh dude i've been saying that for just

as long as you have man really no longer

oh yeah wow

yeah i feel like it's so obvious

but here's the thing is like how will we

claim credit when it happens like is

there a place i go to to be like yeah

pay up like how am i supposed to

claim the credit for that because i

really do

i have gotten to a point where i want to

start claiming credit for being right

about [ __ ] you know

well if you really want to do that and

you want to profit off of it monetarily

then you can just go to a betting market

and you can put on a thing like a date

with the time you can go down to vegas

and uh you can make tons of bets on

stupid [ __ ] like this anywhere man so if

you really want to put your money down

and like i don't want a monetary benefit

but like

i want all of these lefties who say like

all hazes whatever like i want them to

just be like yes hazel's right and then

i want i want i want the the good

my ego wants

to be socially

what happens is uh this is what i would

say is like this or at least this is why

i believe or what i've experienced is um

a lot of times these people were like

really like you know outrageously uh

like you know responding in this way or

whatever

um it's because this thing is going to

like nest in their mind um like it's

like like if it's uh like because they

have like a knee-jerk like pavlovian

reaction to like an overreact to it it's

because this thing is going to like

haunt their minds and in some cases it's

sort of like this like pain which is

sort of like you know sticking your uh

tongue and where your tooth just fell

out and you're like poking the nerve and

you can't stop yourself from doing it

for some reason um and uh they'll just

keep doing that and they'll keep they'll

come back they come back to to get full

correction

and um then eventually they'll uh get it

it's happened to me before there's

people who have like you know hated me

and there's like constantly trying to

tell me i'm wrong or whatever and then

they'll come back and they'd be like

okay you're like right about this one

thing but i think you're still wrong

about x y or z and then it's just like

over and over and over again and you

know sometimes they're incapable of

making the

you know the the recognition at the end

and uh sometimes they're just like uh

thanks

that's nice you get that when someone

says thanks

yeah but he with me is that i don't feel

like i'm going to forgive these people

when they say infrared rising thank you

i feel like i'm still a little bitter

and i'm going to be like you know what

[ __ ] you you should have said thanks you

have to yeah you have to

it's hard for me to forgive honestly

it's so hard i know dude it's like i'm

for real though this is like the message

of christ so you know

i'm like i'm very serious about this

though man like you know like

i see so many people like affect it and

like i hate how it's used as like a

political prop but i mean like

it's

it's uh

it's like the most important book ever

written and it's uh like very uh [ __ ]

i don't know it's life-changing to read

and uh reread and uh that's what people

have been saying for forever and it's

like unique in that way unlike uh other

things

you know my relation to religion a lot

of the time and this is a self-criticism

i'm gonna do is that i'm a hypocrite so

what i do is i say

there's a lot of salvation here and

wisdom or whatever but i'm gonna ignore

it intentionally so i can sin a lot

and then yes when i'm done sinning i'll

come back to it and learn my lesson but

first i wanna

that's how i know you're an american

actually in your heart because that's

that's the american relation that's the

pragmatic relation really yeah precisely

you go you get drunk on saturday night

and then you go over pen sunday morning

the irish way too you know that's my

whole that's my life

uh in some ways but um that's not really

what it's about like uh that's uh that's

the uh outward ceremony of it all

yeah no when you say that it's a hundred

percent true like uh despite my ethnic

whatever background i'm 100 american and

that's in my soul that something deep in

my soul is very american

and i just can't control that you know

it's whether i like america or not i

have the curse

of america inside of me

in some ways it's not well like that's

why it's like because everything comes

mixed and uh you know like because there

there's some aspects of like what what

was being like kind of covered up like

all of these things being like put into

one camp as like sinful things or like

things that uh you know um you know are

bad and like banned and uh that wasn't

good that wasn't a good relation because

there were good things in there too and

you don't want to ban good things so

then you have like every so like we've

kind of been more in this like sort of

like libertarian age where it's kind of

like everything out like you know

everything everything everything we're

going to try everything all like you

know this repression of the freudian

repression or whatever we're going to go

everything out in the open and i feel

like we've already like done that that's

what the internet is everything out in

the open we can like really confront

we can look at it and be like okay so

this is like what the psyche of of our

people is like like you know [ __ ] out

there so like let's decide if this is

like what what do we do about this

you know in in a way my streams most of

the time is a form of sin to me

the way i act on stream and the type of

[ __ ] i say on stream like 99 of the time

um i'm usually like this is not

something i would say to logo

this is not something i would say to

caleb this is

it it's well the thing is is like the

medium compels it right like because

that's uh that's content that's like and

it's kind of funny people say that all

the time on twitch and they're like yeah

it's like this content but like it

drives like i remember watching the the

saga of like ice beside it ice poseidon

i feel like oh no we we can't he's he's

been so oh i can't talk about him no no

yeah it's oh my god dude we live in we

live in the [ __ ] dumbest times holy

[ __ ] like it's so dumb

yeah

like i said it's like i'm

i want 1776 to commence again man like

this is what i believe in this is too

much for me look i'm i'm i'm i'm a

humble peasant who lives in fear of the

khan you know the khan's wrath

i have to cower in fear

but that's it's you're failing the

dialectical challenge then there man you

gotta fight to the death no against that

absolutely gonna fight to the death

against the bad policy against the the

master slave dialectic absolutely not

i i humbly evolve myself a slave i read

consciousness of twitch

yeah yeah

i guess you do have to have more of a

stoical self-conception to be a good

streamer because the whole goal is to be

like destiny right and it's like nothing

could faze destiny because he has no

shame

no my goal is uh

my goal is to use this as a launching

pad to start a media company

yeah

i i don't know you guys

your documentaries and things are

probably the highest quality stuff

there's something

that's that's what it's about that's

right honestly the debates are like

mostly a waste of time um i tried out

like the tried it out but it's really a

waste of time

my goal is so the the strategy is

accumulate concentrate and retain as

much attention as possible for as long

as possible up the ante and keep upping

the ante on the documentaries and create

a feedback cycle where

i constantly do stupid and ugly things

in order to produce

smart and beautiful things

better than before you know

yeah that's kind of that's it's a good

it's a good move it's like it's like

it's gonna be really hard for you it's

like what tamerlan did tamerlane

he went and he he did this horrible

barbaric [ __ ] and then he collected all

of the um

the artists and the artisans and the

painters and poets

philosophers and he

he brought them to summer con right and

um

the more ugly [ __ ] he did and the more

infamous he was the

more beautiful the

products of the renaissance could be

i mean that's like the uh that's the

sort of um

that's the sort of uh tragic mantle of

the uh comi the uh actual like communist

revolutionaries right is uh

like mao and uh

stalin is uh like we live in a time

where uh

i don't know i don't really know it's

like you have to you have to uh

like be you have to like

being

inducted into like the [ __ ] occult in

this country

like i feel like i'm like in a lot of

ways i feel like i'm like like the the

ex mason or something like the x 33rd

degree ascended same same i feel like

i'm an x

i don't know if i i ever got to that

position but i always see myself as an

ex

i see myself as mike from twin peaks i

used to be you know mike like the bob's

friend who repented or whatever i was

like that i was in some strange

dark

mystical whatever place where

i was tempted i didn't ever went there

but

i was being tempted by some dark

presence of some kind

and

i just climbed my way out i guess

yeah it's like you kind of like uh

theater don't but uh there there's like

key decision moments like i can remember

times like i know what you know

like like the devil whispering in your

ear and it's like when you make that

decision it's like you really are

choosing like a fork in the road i read

a beautiful blog once and it's from a

long time ago where it's like this you

know

old shitty blog simple blog

and it was just this guy describing how

why he left freemasonry he was saying he

got really high in the degrees of

freemasonry

and then

he he came to some kind of masonic

um ceremony was just him and another guy

where they were meeting with

the leader of the freemason whatever he

was getting anointed with the degree or

whatever and then he said randomly just

spontaneously

he looked around the masonic temple and

he was just overcome with this dark

feeling and he said i felt like i was in

a coffin

like i looked around and and i know the

masons talk about a god and a grand

architect but he said i just had this

very

huge feeling of death and just i was in

a coffin like the masonic building was

just this coffin right and then he said

yeah

and then he said uh so i turned around

spontaneously and i left

and ever since then i never looked back

and now i walk in the step of christ or

whatever so you know in the light of

christ so to me and you know what's so

profound what he said uh the coffin

thing because that is what masonry is

it's a way part of the uh that's

actually part of the skull and bone

ceremony yeah you lay in the coffin but

the the masons

try to reify the living essence of god

and it is in a sense like

a dead thing that they worship

worship uh disembodied reason yeah

precisely and what it is is what it is

is christianity without the revelation

because that no christ christ as a

historical figure as a person as a real

person in the world

um he's just he was just another

messenger for this

disembodied rationality precisely

precisely yes and

the revelation is another word for like

the living the source of the living

essence right that's something that's

just

it's be it's can't be domesticated it

can't be formally

uh

it can't be replicated with formal

precision it can't be artificially

created it's

not premised

it's holistic it's a monad

i'm getting into live nets but uh

yeah it's uh that's like where the whole

masonic cosmos comes from is it well

it's it's a little bit more complicated

but the one that we know like

enlightenment era masonry on through

like theosophy to now

is uh it's so influential that it's

literally everywhere

that makes sense like it's bled into

people are unconsciously this i've had

psychotic breaks where i was like what

the [ __ ] it is everywhere like holy [ __ ]

this is not a joke this is this is real

life this is not a gay like i went to

the masonic temple once for a party

an event

and i just had like a near psychotic

break

um i would say yeah thankfully but

because i was like what the [ __ ] this is

actually real life this isn't like

something i read on the computer like

this is actually real life like

they made a whole building dedicated to

this

you know what i mean you should see san

francisco it's literally like the

masonic design city i walk around and

i'm just like in a perpetual it's like

it's like one of the weirdest places in

the country but uh like the masons built

this place it's so paranoid because when

you live in this world you want to feel

like there's an element of spontaneity

and

authenticity oh that's the beauty of

hegel though right is that literally

everything you see

everything

literally everything to the smallest

tiny little thing is perfectly rational

you can and it has a perfectly

reasonable like history that would

unfold so much about the world like if

you were to trace it like because it

contains every piece of the world

contains the history of the whole entire

world

yeah

so

so is that both you and contract or you

independent because i know both

also we kind of we've been uh i mean man

we've been friends and talking about the

same stuff for so long i know you guys

are both really into the

liveness now

mode analogy

yeah monads

yeah

um it makes sense though this is like uh

uh dude it connects to like john d dude

it's i don't know what other people are

doing with their livestocks but like i

have such a great time just uncovering

all of this crazy [ __ ] about the world

and uh people get mad at me for like

just talking what is the connection to

john d

from well he wrote the monast

hieroglyphica right which is the

hieroglyphic monad and uh what it was is

um they used this sort of like mana it

was like called like um hieroglyphic

hermeneutics and it's this idea of

creating these like nested

layers of um of meaning that are meant

to mean different things to different

audiences so it's encrypting

uh in this package for public

consumption mess different messages to

different people

that's like where the rent their like

shakespearean theater

comes from is like this sort of

a type of storytelling

uh that like this was a

innovation

um

like uh in the book the hieroglyphic

monad itself it has like a geopolitical

level like there are parts of it that

are like meant for the queen to read and

like there's like encrypt you know what

i mean like but it was also like

available for public consumption

yes but you know what's creeping me out

is like i have

done this practice like independently

without knowing about john d or anything

like

a lot of my writings in the past

have been layered like this

it's because we've all read shakespeare

like i mean shakespeare basically is uh

you know he's he's like a world

historical figure

for this sort of reason and in fact the

this is like what's so [ __ ] nuts

about like the actual reality of who

wrote shakespeare and like what it

actually means

um it's because the shakespeare name and

like the title and like this figure is

also like a high it's a [ __ ] hologram

dude like it's not a real entity it's a

completely fictitious historical entity

and uh that it means different thing

like you know what i mean it so this is

like what the british invented was this

sort of

uh insane level you could call it like

black magic and stuff like that right

but what it is is like uh yeah like

it's like public relations marketing

theater theater stagecraft meredith

narrativeology like dramatizations um

acting

um you know intelligence networks

finance like manipulation of markets

piracy

i wonder if the monad is what i call the

sovereign object

anglo-saxon metaphysics because to me

this is all about the birth of um

this kind of substance or this kind of

object which is

fundamentally

uh the only absolute everything else

being like

transient and unreal or

not fundamental but

i my question what i never understood

about monets is

how are there different monets would it

like how how how are their differences

basically

you'd you'd be like honestly man like

when it comes down to like like you're

like a more classically trained and like

the philosophical like rigor rigmarole

and whatnot so you could you should talk

to combot about that because he would

love to go off on this especially and i

won't do as good of a job as he will

frankly because he's like

i learned so much from him about this

stuff because like that wasn't really my

forte but i've gotten more literate on

that stuff over the years

but like i'm more of like a theology guy

or whatever you know yeah yeah yeah and

also literature

yeah yeah that's like i'm more of like

into revelation i guess like have

the socialist realist book it was posted

in the 30s it's called

uh

the road to the ocean

you know that one

i know i haven't read that one have you

heard of it

um i don't know if that is that the like

exact english translation does it have a

different name or because i don't know

it's

uh

called the road to the ocean

leonid leonov

i don't know that one no

uh good have you read it yeah i really

like it

i really like it

it's probably one of i don't read a lot

of literature actually

um i'm kind of a fanatic i only read

theory and the subtlety of literature is

i don't have that i'm

the best theory is literature like it is

uh

that's but that's why i don't see look

i'll read philosophy i'll read hegel

i'll read anything

literature is so much work for me

because

i don't just it's so funny yeah everyone

everyone's like oh rick reading books

like blah blah it's actually like it's

uh people say everyone has this anxiety

because uh the technology you could say

the the mental like mappings like the

memory palaces and things like this that

required to

actually like enjoy a tight like a

renaissance and satire or something is

so far away from

what uh the contemporary like

pedagogical institutions treat yeah like

train your mental habits to be it's so

hard to appreciate

to appreciate literature you have to

commit so much you have to really pay a

lot of attention what's being uh the

thing is is that like the whole point of

literature is um it's better than

philosophy for this reason i agree

because because it trick and when you're

adapting your mind as a reader to like

read this book

changing your mind

is a change in your reality like you

will walk around after reading certain

books and you will never see things the

same way

if you if you look at philosophers all

they do is

borrow um sayings and mannerisms from

literature and you think it's just an

irony where like as they as shakespeare

said or as whatever said like hegel does

this all the time for example yeah and

well the reason for that is because

literature is where the fundamental

stuff is right philosophy is just a

secondhand

attempt you know

it's just like the theology of

revelation so you could say like that

like this philosophy is then like like

hegel's sort of like the phil the

theology of the radical reformationist

literature

yeah

yeah i would say so

that's how i it's made sense to me and

uh i would say like you know um like

that's even where like sort of marks and

angles are to me in a sense where i

think like uh

make uh they they they say a lot about

uh it shows a lot about like the reality

of oh this is this is also important

you know a lot of people don't realize

this

but a lot of people speculate oh why is

it that the revolution happened in

russia

well

i'll tell you one thing that made the

bolsheviks better than the european

marxists

they all came from the whole reason they

became bolsheviks

was because of literature it was all

literature it was all russian

revolutionary literature from

the 19th century that's where that was

their background and if you think about

in america you guys okay why are these

people calling themselves communists

it's also for aesthetic reasons and by

aesthetic reasons i don't mean cosmetic

i mean like it's grounded in this like

rev this aesthetic that of like this is

how i make sense of the world right

through this um literary the story that

i live in yeah exactly but when you look

at american leftists the literature

quote-unquote that they're coming from

it's the like literature of um disney

channel teen tween shows and the cw

shows

just book [ __ ] tumblr [ __ ] or

whatever and that's where their whole

literary aesthetic is coming from

it's coming from dumb movies and [ __ ]

whereas

but i i'm not don't get me wrong i know

movies are more stupid but i also kind

of play with movies a little bit too i

play with the dark knight rises

uh

bane and that condition we're just

telling you man like chris nolan is the

most obvious british intelligence he's

the biggest piece of [ __ ] ever the world

dude do you know what school he went to

like his whole life like what his friend

he's like a east india british east

india guy like you know i hate him right

i only like his batman movies in spite

like it's almost like the devil made

this movie and that's how you can see

the anxieties of the ruling class or

whatever and that's why the villains are

the ones i'm i'm with they're right no

that's like that that's like the irony

of it right is that everyone actually

like didn't no one gave a [ __ ] about

batman in uh those movies we like the

villains we like the things that nolan

fears and nolan but then they made like

the joker movie and uh like it's you

know it's okay it was pretty good it was

alright i liked it yeah

it's kind of forgettable though

yeah it's the same not it doesn't it

won't have the staying power as uh

they'll yeah

yeah i don't know he's glad ledger

tapped into some [ __ ] on that one though

he went like he was like sounded like

[ __ ] like

like tom waits and like [ __ ] like he

actually likes

me like

but the characters that he took for

inspiration were interesting because he

specifically was trying to be like a tom

waits joker like tom wait's like the

like the junkyard band like horse voice

like captain beefheart fan tom waits

i don't know who tom waits is who's tom

wakes oh dude you gotta listen to tom

waits man this is american culture

tom woods gotta

not joking this is like vital

oh i'll note i wrote it down

but um

and dogs and dogs you gotta listen to

rain dogs

yeah i mean um

you know but that's the thing is that

what if the first step to making

american communism is we just need

better literature we just need better

artists we can't read

yeah or or just a better aesthetic in

general right i wrote a really good book

i'm not gonna lie but uh people can't

read anymore or what what people want to

read is um is uh something that they've

already read before it's like pretty

much everything's very stimulating

any type of ambition in literature is

considered pretentious well if you're

trying to do anything

is uh people are gonna

that they don't want to try i'm honest

to god why do you think i stream like

the only next step would be porn but

why do you think i stream because

i've i believe you have to go to the

lowest and most base medium of conveying

information just in order i kind of

agree yeah that's why i'm on twitter but

twitter's like uh

no it's uh twitter is like i guess like

the closest we have to a literary medium

if if i if i if i like um

if i believed people can be convinced

like right like not rationally but like

through using their head

oh thank you so much jackson appreciate

you man appreciate you so much man

then i would have just continued writing

my books and wrote beautiful prose and

poetry and what i was working on with

that

but

you have to begin from

the lowest

in order to make an effect you know no i

do think we have to make art about

how we are where we are because

basically the counter narrative

is just the marvel cinematic universe

because the marvel cinematic universe

doesn't exist for no reason

but it has a purpose it's vital to our

society people don't even accept the

possibility of other aesthetics so

that's the terrifying thing is that you

know like any movie that defies the mcu

metanewme

like where you can't be like oh this is

just like the mc like any movie that is

considered fascist and evil and and

right wing and and problematic even

[ __ ] joker was considered

a very dangerous film because it wasn't

it's like it's unbelievable how we've

gotten to this point we're like the only

aesthetic that's it's not even that it's

the only one we're allowed to have it's

the it's the only one that people

recognize exists beyond which lies evil

meaninglessness chaos and death or

whatever right so it's very terrifying

how like people don't even wreck you

know i always i always say i feel so

much pity for the people that

that are hating on me on twitter

whatever because they will never have an

aesthetic experience

of

what i would consider authentic beauty

they will never be able to just

they're missing out on a lot that's what

i'm trying to say you know yeah

they are in hell

really like they're they

not happy people there you usually like

that's sometimes what's fun to do like

you know uh you gotta you get a critic

or whatever and you just

search their at for like depressed or

kill myself or suicide or

depress you know all of these things and

it's like oh yeah this is the type of

person

um

yeah i mean um

i don't know it's it's it's

yeah there's just

[ __ ] man

a lot of it it's just there's a void

it's like a nihilistic void and i think

that um yeah people should be making

better art but the thing is is that uh

the art mark like look at nfts like what

is the what is art now right like i

wrote this but like i wrote my book when

but the book's real point is about like

the what what the fate of the artist

like in our own time or whatever

effectively right and uh so many of the

things that i wrote in this novel are

now just not even metaphors they like

just exist they're like things that i

was like making up or like

as like a parody or like as an extension

of trends and uh now they're just real

and um

like what's you know

it's it's not what people want to read

people what people want to read is the

you know the mcu version of uh

the type of literature they already like

it's like uh

what do you get you get an ethno

narcissistic uh like family chronicles

in the sort of iowa writers workshop

style that the new york times all props

up all these books no one actually reads

but everyone reviews well they just

mutually say that they're all good but

no one's actually reading these books

um it's a totally like fake art market

uh it's a totally fake like market

pretty much always

and uh i've been trying to like you know

i've always wanted to breathe life into

the arts because it feels kind of

moribund

um but uh there's some good there's

always good stuff happening it's just

not happening uh for most people most

people don't get to see it

yeah i mean um

i don't know uh

uh

i don't need i still don't really know

what an nft is and i i don't know if i

want to commit to

it's uh it's literally just a money

laundering vehicle and and the the

reason why it has to be an art object or

quote unquote considered that way is

because art uh in this sense is treated

uniquely in our like financial system

and like people are using like paintings

and stuff to launder money and uh they

started to like close down those

loopholes so now we have nfts and uh all

the money laundering is just going into

nfts and people are pretending that

something else is happening but that's

all that is i i wonder if there's a way

to um

i don't know i'm always trying to find

ways of making money so

how can i such an american house you

really are you really you're i don't

know how can i get on getting in on this

scam you know like what can i do the

american way that is literally the most

tragic in the world it's like no like

think about like ed and eddie did you

watch edit yes i did

and like i kind of have a love for the

sort of husterishness of america where

it's like

people are just like [ __ ] crazy like

plying their [ __ ] you know like everyone

just like out there

whatever um but it it's ter it turns

this is like a theosophical thing though

right because like a lot of is like the

powers of persuasion the powers of

marketing the powers of selling yourself

the powers of uh you know like getting

people to give you money you know is

like that's the skills that are what's

funny is that you know we talk about uh

the liberal arts majors or whatever it's

like oh those people aren't studying

real sciences like you know you're

reading uh you're reading theory like

that's not a real science like i do hard

science and uh i went to business school

and i studied marketing like you know

it's like we have schools that are just

basically black magic schools where it's

like you learn how to do marketing and

like you know uh consumer uh consumer

research and that's how you know we

don't we don't have any markets anymore

if we had real markets we would be able

to go to a school for marketing a

market's a market you have to create

markets no you have to create markets we

create markets that's what we do we we

like that's that's how you make money

you don't make money by selling things

in a market you make a lot of money by

creating a new market yeah

true

that's what we do we create new markets

and everything

because that's how you you make money

right and everyone's looking for a good

scam so it's like hey well i'm going to

open a market for nfts i always saw that

business school is the quickest way to

waste your time because

real business you don't understand

business school you don't understand

what it's for

really

that's creating a spirit of core it's

about networking it's about going on

yeah true

i always you don't do [ __ ] anything

have you ever met anyone who's got it to

me real business

is very anti-social it's like

i'm more like a talib guy like

you can't be in an instant oh it's not a

business man no

tala was a day trader dollop was a he

was on the trading desk

he's a broker he's an anti-social he

represents like an anti-social hey but

the thing about what he actually is he

but taleb is like the stoic financial

individualist who's just speculating on

things and suspended in like liberal

anoraxia like i like talab but he is the

epitome of like the rowan roman stoic

like the pre like you know what i mean

he's just uh he's just placing his bets

in like you know with a view of the

inevitable black swan of death right

yeah but uh

uh there's no uh there's no resurrection

here

um there's no uh

it's uh that's taleb but talab is he's a

day trader this is the this is the

ideology of finance pros this is rise

and grind sigma grindset this is uh

but this is what uh marx and engels

called the uh lumpen proletariat uh

reorganized at the level of like the

aristocracy

yeah

like the financial anarchist the

financial piracy i always see it the

latter of mark i i don't know i always

see it as anti-social because

it's capitalism is fundamentally

anti-social like uh

if we're gonna have capitalism let's

just

i'll just be a real capitalist i'm not

gonna be part of their you know

socialism and

network with all these people well it's

like what does capitalism mean because

we don't have what is what is real

capitalism i don't think uh anyone who

self-describes as a capitalist wouldn't

call what we have now real capitalism is

what's funny right yeah like if

someone's like like oh i'm a real

capitalist like you know i've read the

theory i believe in capitalism and my

interpretation of it and we definitely

don't have capitalism here are the

reforms that i would recommend so that

we could have something closer to real

capitalism so like we don't have

capitalism right now because like

capitalism is this [ __ ] most nebulous

[ __ ] thing in the world it's a

complete ideological fiction

what that means to people like is so

vague and diffuse

yeah yeah i mean

but at the end of the day you know if i

always tell those people a party is a

corporation it's a business

that's the only reason parties exist

today that's the whole point of

communism is that it's like as supposed

to out-compete

what is around it it's not supposed to

be put in because the good guys did a

trick

like they did a trick and they said

we're liberals jk we're actually super

far leftist and now you have to deal

with it and we're gonna make utopia and

you're gonna begging you're gonna kick

and scream but it's good for your own

good which is the view of the fabians

and all of the leftists which is that

the people couldn't possibly accept this

you have to do it through subterfuge

yeah yeah

that's that's not how it actually works

you know

that's how uh that's how they view it is

uh this sort of uh subdivision

as opposed to building something this is

uh shifting gears but do you have any

info on the origins of the 1619 project

like who is is anyone behind this

specifically like what i remember it's

some [ __ ] uh it's definitely british

though

it all connects to well it all connects

to like the

talking about like the international

organization of like scientists and

academic professionals etc

in the english-speaking world the center

for that is like at the end of the day

it's like london dc manhattan

yeah

so and that's one place and uh their

whole thing right is like they want they

like the notion of the anglosphere and

in some ways like there's like the

rehabilitation of the british empire

thank you

sorry this thing isn't good

it's a weird form of rehabilitation

because it's one where it's like listen

like we accept like our own sins but

like you know we're still doing our best

the idea of the new british empire

well because the cpusa just endorsed it

in uh in their video they were saying

the 1619 project is the way forward okay

do you want me to tell you like let's

see who funds it it literally takes me

like two seconds to find out like what

the [ __ ] is going on with these things

oh it's new york times then it's london

yeah

the new york times is a hereditary

aristocracy you know yeah yeah like it's

uh it's a

it's like a a mold buggiest always like

to talk about how it's uh it's a

monarchy

in uh the state but uh yeah the new york

times just takes its orders from

basically uh like the guardian and like

this general like british uh

intelligence world think about it they

ran the russiagate [ __ ] right yeah

where'd that come from it came from

british intelligence

literally literally that's not even

that's not even a speculation that's

just like admitted history no i know i

know right absolutely

crazy no one gives a [ __ ] man no one can

see it no it once you have the eyes to

see though you can't unsee it but it's

like trying to like

sorry like you know why i stopped being

interested in that is because it's like

i s

i started to see all this [ __ ] and then

i was like but what difference does it

make like nobody cares you know so i

feel like i'm more of like in a david

lynch mentality where it's like

ah who cares you know just

it's kind of that's i've been there man

i know what that's like it's like uh i

wouldn't say it's a fun place to be but

uh this is sort of like a i would

recommend this a bologna thing where

he's talking about it's this essay he

wrote about the various patrons you can

have um

and uh

he says there's like this biggest gap

where it's like at the end like you

realize you're writing for the void and

it's like

again you accept that you're writing for

the void you know something like that

where it's really like

i actually want to be writing for an

audience or for

like this particular thing to see an

immediate like feedback or whatever like

yeah like i wanna

but like that's that's something you

wanna get over that's a sickness like

wanting to like get the response that

you desire from people for like telling

the truth what you should really want is

the recognition of uh like you to be

already like reconciled no no that

that's where i've been for years is that

it's the void right

yeah i mean that's like a lot that i

that's like all of us that's like a big

uh it's a big uh like we have a big

problem of nihilism like i know from

myself like you know i feel like it

hasn't been annihilus these days it's

like the way i've been though for years

is that i didn't even go on twitter i

was just like i don't care to have an

audience i just want to do this

for its own sake even just maybe for me

but

i don't have an audience you know i only

started having an audience when i went

live

but i completely disconnected like my

esoteric true

theory that i care about with this this

is just like an experiment

in popular

discourse whatever that

i am not a hundred thousand percent

invested in i'm i am invested in it to

an extent but

not like my books not like my writings

you know like that's where my real soul

is you know this is just that that's

something i like that with because like

i wanted to be a writer right like i

love literature i've been writing stuff

for a long time um poetry and things

like that so i was always like okay well

like how do you actually do that you

know like how do you actually like do

that today like how do you get anyone to

read your book and it's like okay well

you just like go to like uh a good

school

i

get connections to like publishing

industry type people right and then you

just get like a book deal but even worse

is

how could anyone under how can i get

people to understand it you know what i

mean like i have a specific sense

and how do i convey that to others and

because it's like it seems like

perfectly yeah like the thing is is that

you don't actually want to write for the

public because writing for the public

actually a book that speaks greatly to

the public means that that book is

doomed to die that book is totally

irrelevant that book is actually not

even necessary because all it's doing is

uh telling people things that they

already know right yeah because it's

like baseline readers can just totally

exhaust it and that's like most media

and things people encounter right where

it's just like on the first your first

pass through you're like yep this pretty

much exhausted that's about it that's

all it was there it is it's like a big

circle like a pops up disappears it

doesn't really make a splash because it

didn't reveal anything um the books that

are like immortal books like eternal

like books the books that stick around

uh where most of the time they're not

ones that are popular in their time or

even known or you know some of them they

like were weren't even published or just

found in fragments or you know um things

like this like those

like

moby dick for instance moby dick massive

flop no one read it wasn't read for so

long was like totally panned in the

press and then it was rediscovered by

the modernists as like

this is it like this is already a

modernist novel like this was so far

ahead of its time it reveals so much

because herman melville was so far ahead

of the readers of his time that he

couldn't even like he encrypted this

like understanding of his own time like

and like

like theological problems and uh and

like the development of philosophy and

like american history everything he

could possibly fit together he's putting

into like this encyclopedic type like

encrypted codex called moby dick

you know and

people at his own time couldn't

understand it yeah i mean it was

impossible for them to understand it it

was only possible for people in the

future to understand it

well the the thing is is that

i became aware of this how that works

like anything that means anything is

only going to be appreciated way later

it's not going to be like

but that's why when i started streaming

i started to every time i'm

like people when whenever that happens

i'm like okay

it's like it's like in terminator 2 when

they're too late

and they're they're you know how they're

like racing in that film against time

and you're too late well it doesn't

matter because it's gonna happen anyway

but still you lost that's how i think of

it too it's like

my goal is to find a way to just

um

make an impression now and if i can't do

that i don't care if it like in a year

or two people are like oh

oz was right it's like yeah but

i want it to be right now you know

you know what i mean like i messed up

i'm i failed that kind of that it's not

it's not enough to be right

for me the thing is though is that that

i feel like that's sort of the desire to

like you know you do a thing and then

there's like the action immediate like

reaction or like you know yeah that you

cannot push this over and it'll fall

this is sort of something that i think

is ingrained in a it's like part of the

problem with um our generation or like

being a growing up with like this uh

this uh hyper stimulating environment is

um with like so much immediate

gratification because that's not

actually like how anything works like

anything that's meaningful does not have

that sort of um

and actually give you like immediate

feedback or it that doesn't have this uh

this relation it's far more in like the

realm of ambiguity and uh you not

knowing like

dwelling in like unknowing and

essentially like requiring faith to

continue forward right because like if

you're writing this book if you're like

if you're like say you're like herman

melville and uh you're getting you're

like kind of uh your your your book

sales from like your earlier books the

ones that are popular before you start

to piss off the critics your money's

starting to go away yeah you have to go

back to work you can't just like [ __ ]

be a writer anymore because you're not

making enough money

and uh so you're back at like the

customs house and things like that

you're working this [ __ ] accounting

job and you're writing [ __ ] moby dick

hi

you're writing this like you're putting

all this effort into it like how did he

do it how did he everyday justify this

to himself put it out there gets totally

ravaged in the press no one reads it no

one cares everyone calls him a madman he

people thought he was dead when he was

still alive he's like completely

irrelevant to like the literary world to

like world literature he's a castaway

people are writing things like pitying

him and trying to send him money because

like you know he's kind of poor um

this guy wrote he where did he find the

power to do that you know like how do

you do that

what kind of mindset do you have to have

to even be able to do something like

that

the type of faith like hawthorne said

that melville was the most um like

religious person he'd ever met and the

real problem melville had was that he

was like so dedicated to the truth that

like he couldn't decide like

what what what like the historicity of

christ and things like this and like

what like what was true in christianity

like what wasn't in this like age of

enlightenment like that's why like one

of his most like unread but like

greatest works is uh claro which is this

uh it's like one of the longest epic

poems in english and it's about uh his

pilgrimage to uh jerusalem when he

actually did go

like his uh his uh spiritual struggle

there and it's like such a

such a marvelous [ __ ] work of

literature you know and it's a

[ __ ] i don't know man there's a

little

treasures hidden in the world by people

put in a lot of work like storing up

treasures in heaven you could say and uh

it's nice to see you can find them you

know and uh that's that's what life is

like you can't really expect uh

to uh you know being in control of the

powers of this world

you can in eternity if that makes sense

like doing something like melville does

it will pay off like that doesn't you

don't it doesn't just

manuscripts don't burn as it's as uh as

bulgakov said in a master and margarita

which wasn't was only published in uh

sami start in his time you know

these scripts don't burn

yeah um

no i get that it's just um

yeah i mean uh yeah i know what you're

saying i agree

i mean you're doing it you're doing good

stuff and like i i

i mostly agree with you on things like

or at least you see a lot of the same

things that i do and uh which i feel

like not a lot of people can see

because and like especially like the

more you uh

are involved uh the the kind of more

blind you become unless you kind of are

always kind of like uh almost

ritualistically destroying your own

social capital in a way which i could

say that's one way i could describe my

own like internet career is uh people

call me like a relentless contrarian but

it's also like uh i just don't wanna

like i've been an offer i've had many

opportunities to sell out in a larger

way than i've chosen to

how do you um if you don't mind me

asking like do you have a job right now

or what is

the way you're uh i just uh i make money

from my uh from uh my patreon right now

oh okay nice nice

i so i've just uh been making the

podcast and uh you know i think most of

the people who subscribe to me on

patreon like they're just like uh like

what i do in general

yeah or like just want me to like keep

doing what i'm doing because um i do

like different things you know like i'm

talking to you right now and like people

who follow me will want to well would

want me to talk to you right

yeah

so i just like i live on alms i guess

i'm kind of like a [ __ ] pilgrim um

how i choose to look at it i guess but

uh

i'm hoping uh to i have like other

artistic projects in the works and

things like that but i sometimes feel

like uh

almost more important i mean northrop

frye said this too that like in our age

it's almost more important to like get

people to like

teach people how to read again in the

first place

then to like write something new for

them to read because

uh

new things that are being made aren't

very new um they're not really like

that necessary if that makes sense like

there's much more to be gained from us

uh like

learning more about the past that there

is for us to like make another like

trendy piece of like what like another

kind of like black mirror dystopia

sci-fi thing or whatever that everyone

does like do we need another one of

these are they revealing anything not

particularly

yeah

it's like what are we really alienated

from is like [ __ ] real like the

bigger reality of like global history

and like you know these sorts of things

you don't have like historical epics as

movies anymore you know nothing's

grounded in reality or uh in any sort of

continuity it's all sci-fi worlds and uh

alternate realities

yeah i mean um

literature is harder to do than theory

literature is harder than philosophy

literature is harder than uh anything

before we have the courage of great

letter

like literature and art in this country

we're not gonna have i don't think

i think the reason people are on board

with the infrared thing is aesthetic

honestly it is it's that there's just

this fundamental sense

aesthetic doesn't mean just cosmetic

it's i don't mean superficial i just

mean like

it's a story that people like you know

and

that's why i've been able to make the

progress that i have but it's it's not

neces it's not entirely sufficient you

know because

yeah i still get i still managed to be

entangled in this discursive [ __ ]

where all these [ __ ] stupid people on

twitter are making is like oh are you an

american chauvinist and

you know like this dumb [ __ ] that

completely is besides the point you know

my whole aim in life right now is just i

want to get to a space

beyond the discourse

i don't want to have to talk to leftists

for the rest of my life i don't ever

want to have to even talk to these

people like i don't ever want to ever

have to like

even see these people

you know what i mean

you just have to like build your own

[ __ ] thing basically like yeah that's

that's uh that's sort of uh

that was sort of the tragedy at least

like me being like my involvement on

like internet uh politics or whatever is

that i my whole thing was always always

like i just want to like create like be

like like

make like art like like let's try to do

something like uh you know meaningful or

whatever that'll like uh

that's really was more of my inspiration

like i've just wanted to like make

something like artful or like considered

like kind of mind altering in a way

right like that's what art is really

supposed to do

um

and

that's like what a lot of the spirit of

like 2015 and things like that was to me

was like a sort of like uh

it was

like 2010's aesthetics had gotten so

old and like they're still around right

but there was like anybody's

brief attempt to do something else but

it's kind of um

the tragedy for me is that it's like

reconformed into this like very

reducible

um like you know like fast wave like

roman statue

blah blah this [ __ ] it's like so stale

and it's not real life

yeah um

[Music]

the leftist [ __ ] is all

like they don't make good art like

that's like do you remember like there's

all these like people go off and they're

like you know right wing or conservative

people never make great art or whatever

it's like only radical leftist

and it's like that's number one like

totally untrue but number two like what

what have you done for me lately like

what are you what are your great works

of art here pal if you're in charge and

this is your hegemony like what great

artworks you wait it's the same as

revolutions people are trying to claim

the continuity of the great

revolutionaries but it's a tautology

it's like how do you know lenin would be

on your side how do you know mal would

be on your side like why because you

feel like there's just this unbroken

chain of progress and constantly

succession discursively yeah i mean but

how do you know

that in lenin's time he wasn't

considered a shitlord grifter who was

like going against the discourse because

it when you read it that's really what

it sounds like you know it sounds like

lenin was a pariah for the international

socialist movement who was not liked by

the majority of socialists

internationally who was going against

the grain and who was being canceled by

social democracy the same is true for

mao in regards to the soviet bureaucracy

it's like how do you know that you know

the twitter mob would have been

with lenin at the time because i think

all evidence points to the contrary

right

yeah no these people like yeah they're

they're like they're like oh in uh the

time these people would be nazis in nazi

germany like they don't have the actual

courage of convictions because they

don't really have real convictions yeah

principles they have positions

can they have speculation they keep

voting they keep quoting marx and lenin

and mao and these all these

revolutionaries as if they're like

they're part of the continuity of that

and then oh lennon what you see guys our

discourse represents the true inheritor

and successor to to lenin and it's like

but back then your discourse was

international social democracy right you

think that when lenin broke with those

people he was just like

uh he was affirming the discourse no he

was going against everything you know

i mean i don't know how these people

what they have in mind but

um

he was they're actually pretty content

with the way things are actually i think

i just don't think they have this the

recognition that

um

there can be meaning beyond the

discourse

you know it's not not everything they

feel like if the discourse breaks down

nothing can be meaningful so all the

great revolutionaries in history were

always already part of the discourse

right they were always already part of

the twitter mob and they would have

gotten 20 000 likes on twitter and they

would have been ratioing these people

and that's how it would have been

yeah they they're like they they like

yeah that the they're when they uh when

they are doxing a uh uh a soccer mom

for

for protesting um against auntie far or

something yeah well would i tell that i

was like that's what mao would have done

here's all you have to do to prove these

people are not the successors of lenin

and mao and so it's like okay lenin and

mao built parties and led revolutions

how close are you to even getting

to a fraction of that you're nowhere

near that so like how do you know you

are the successor to these revolutions

well effectively effectively what

they'll say though they'll just do this

they'll go well you're not doing that so

effectively we're both now just

acknowledging that we're just larping so

stop pretending like we're doing

anything other than but i feel like the

difference with me at the least is that

i just started you know like a few

months ago so

with the consequences i have for

what people are going to be doing

politically we don't know yet but what

they've been doing

has not made any change for decades you

know well i'm open to failing if my part

yeah you have to be like uh abby right

now you have to uh lead from if this is

a time where martyrdom is called for

leadership

uh because

i feel like your job on twitch

is to destroy the discourse

and um

hey you so what what does that mean like

how do you do that like how are you

going to get to the point where like

um like what what is it i like i feel

like you've made a name for yourself

from being um

like uh like basically what you've the

this basic this this cancellation of

yours recently right the whole tropes of

it is from like the fact that you were

like

being uh like unabashedly like masculine

or like invoking masculinity as like um

in uh

aesthetically which is not normal for

the most part on twitch

um

so that they associate that with like

incels etc right

yeah

the one of the chairs of the the

communist party she was like

is that

sorry there

one of the chairs of the communist party

was like

i don't know what's going on with the

socialist patriots but it kind of

reminds me of the incel movement

it's like

yeah yeah yeah

yeah yeah yeah

yeah yeah well it's because uh like

like you you

they have to fit things into like a

category to like unperson you or

whatever but what so you're saying

you're saying in their view like

masculinity means in so

what it means is what you're supposed to

do is you're supposed to be like a

polite person like destiny or whatever

honestly this is the thing like if you

actually really wanted to deal right but

to be fair though but those i don't

aren't those people the incels like

destiny

destiny gets destroyed

he's famous i get that but like uh

when you take away the thing i don't

have i don't have a problem saying that

i think destiny is a respectable person

in a lot of ways no he is but i'm just

saying like um

aren't those

i don't know like uh it just seems a

little paradoxical to me i don't know

but everyone's an incel right now

because and actually women are but

there's more that we it's the year of

the femme cell right now did you see

that that uh there's more uh women now

than men who haven't had sex in the last

six months

but i feel like

i feel like that's everyone's an intel

but it isn't now yeah isn't that kind of

more choice though because i think women

can

pretty much choose

right like men are the ones who have to

it's not really

you see i mean they they kind of got you

a little bit here yeah i feel like you

understand the dynamics no

fem cells are real dude

cells are real yeah

yeah interesting it's actually more of

them than in cells right now it's

actually you know i i never wanted to be

like super into the sexuality stuff in

the first i don't know why people are

honestly it's just like evo it's like

[ __ ] and people just like basically

just reify the the the market of like

tinder and they make these uh these uh

these three metaphors become conflated

of like the sex sex the marketplace and

nature like are all three the same thing

so it's like uh so it's like cat cat

like social capital is like also [ __ ]

so it's like if you don't make money

then you then you're an insult because

you don't get [ __ ] if you see what i'm

saying like it's all three things yeah

and so if you don't seem like you're

gonna make a lot of money

i see it's it's just weird that there's

so much public investment in the

sexuality of

political figures

you know what i mean like it's not weird

because we live in like porn empire and

if you're just like oh everything's porn

then it's like yeah obviously people

beat off to like the president

true probably

yeah i mean um

yeah it

that is weird but

um

it's just funny seeing the like the

seven year old woman who's the chair of

the cpusa

it kind of reminds me of the ins

like why though you know

also like incels is like such an inside

the age of the intel is already over

like that it was white boy summer was

the a end of the age of the insult it's

the age of the femme cells now and

actually you're all gonna when you i

don't i feel like people are underrating

how bad that is going to make well okay

to to entertain that for a second

it is i do find it a little bit weird

that

i did not interact with these women i

had nothing against them i never said

anything bad against them i had nothing

to do with them

and yet i had scores of women

like imposing themselves on me in an

unwanted way with

pictures the inappropriate pictures and

no men can't be sexually harassed by

women like it's fine and uh saying that

like you you get no [ __ ] and like

you're dick small like trying to like

sexually humiliate you but it reminds me

of the behavior of a bitter man against

a random woman like why are these women

coming at me when

it reminds me of something an incel

would do to a woman i've met women

women

a lot of women show me that they're

stalkers and they're like harassers and

[ __ ]

and

for the first time in my whole life i

saw women doing that and it was against

me right which shocked me because i was

like but why i never

it's not like i get it if you defend

yourself and whatever go hard but

what did i ever do to you you know

what did i do to deserve this you know i

didn't deserve a picture of your

what i mean

well it's not for you it's nothing

actually those pictures are worth

nothing it's meaningless you probably

don't even remember what they look like

because there's pornography i thankfully

but it's like

it's not even like special it doesn't

mean anything it's like [ __ ] spam

like that's like the funny thing is that

like that sort of uh that would be like

you know in the 1940s that's like you

know that would be one of the most

intimate things you could possibly do

send someone maybe

someone said that it's because i'm from

a lebanese culture but i just feel like

when you send someone nude pictures of

yourself it's like

that's

seems like a personal thing to do you

know

um

it's not anymore i guess right we have

like that's the internet that's porn

stars etc so

not that special like that was actually

just self-promotion on their part they

were just using you as an advertising

vehicle

and basically you could say in a way

they were really advertising towards

like the other guys where uh they feel

like uh now they're closer to her

because uh they're not like you

so then they're does that make sense

like there's a lot of like parasocial uh

weird like fetish things in a

america this is the symbolism of the

[ __ ] of babylon in the bible actually

is that the way all of this works

yeah i mean um

so that's interesting i'm not you're way

more in tune with cultural trends than

me i i don't it's hard for me to keep up

with all this all this [ __ ] but i think

it's like

just like that's uh the the that's the

zeitgeist or whatever man or the

volksgeist it's uh you gotta stay in

touch with it

yeah um

yeah i i

that yeah it's just interesting i mean

um i do think people are very

unsatisfied in general people are very

unsatisfied with

their sexuality and their relationships

and their lives so lately but i just

hate

i always preferred privacy i wish i

didn't have to be involved in other

people's sexuality and

vice versa i wish i could just be

private but i can't anymore and i'm a

public figure so i always have to talk

about it

all the time now

yeah yeah it's uh

i'm like what's funny is that like i'm

like i was like i'm like generally a

pretty private person but now i'm like a

very public person i guess

yeah um

and that was like hard for

me but it was like kind of like uh i

grew a lot through uh it was kind of

more like uh i realized how little uh i

actually like you know um

[ __ ] you know like you like you have

like like everyone has like these

insecurities about things and whatever

and uh clearly like that's what

everyone's going to like target or like

attempt to target and uh yeah like

manipulating you in various ways but

like you know uh it doesn't really mat

like you know you like it's uh you can

kind of like accept things about

yourself and not really uh

really matter um but uh it's uh

that's like the problem that's yeah it

sucks being a public person in that

sense like i do wish um

i would have done it like fully

anonymously but it's not really possible

i tried really hard i was like

didn't get talks for a long time but you

can't it's inevitable

yeah i mean um

[Music]

it's kind of weird

i don't know

my my internal reaction all the time is

just

uh

puzzlement i'm always just puzzled like

how am i supposed to react then i mean

like

like i react for

public reasons but internally i'm always

just like

i i i force myself to care more than i

do authentically

yeah

you know i force what you mean but

that's why i'm taking breaks from

twitter and [ __ ] because it's like

it's so tiring really bad for you it's

like yeah because my fear is that

if i go with my instinct and just ignore

everything

they'll see that as like weakness and

i'll look bad so i have to do something

the thing is like my solution basically

is that like i i i don't care to have a

large audience um at all i actually try

sometimes to like uh get rid of parts of

my audience

so

then my solution because it's like

people are being like annoying i just

get rid of them now and uh it's great

if people like if someone's just being

pestering or you know getting uh

getting a quote tweeted by annoying

people i just i just block them i just

get rid of them

and uh it's a it's a wonderful it's

great

i highly recommend doing it there's

actually because as you say like you're

saying you want to be above the

discourse the moment you're above the

discourses

the psychological projection that a lot

of people do like

i don't maybe i don't i can't pick up on

social cues or something but every time

something happens like people quote to

me they're like hahaha you just got

shattered how do you feel and i'm like

um

not any nothing and then they're like oh

that's a cope you're actually

your soul

your soul has been shattered and you're

broken and destroyed and it's like

did something happen that i'm not aware

of barely it's literally like black

magic because what it is yeah

if you have a group of people right and

they all start saying this and they all

start like no no no you're broken from

this like and you're really actually

like it makes me paranoid and it makes

me think like did something happen

that i should care about well the thing

exactly exactly so that like and then if

you get enough people doing this then uh

if you you would like start to believe

it yourself right and then you kind of

make it actually happen right if like if

enough people if every day everyone you

met was just like looking at you and

they're like they're like

really yourself like how long would it

take how long would it take to start

thinking about it actually a lot of

people did say that to me a lot of

people

but do you see what i'm saying like

that's it's actually like like that is

like uh like

uh

black magic means is that sort of uh

this sort of like the use of these sort

of like

like repeated symbol exposures you know

to

mold your mind so like these people like

effectively like you can say it's like

very larpy and stuff and it's like and

it's like you know cyber bullying's not

real you can turn it off all this

stuff's true but like um a lot like

i especially like i try to like see the

best in people or like be charitable

even people who are being mean to me

um i like sometimes will be try to like

be uh pretty even-handed or whatever but

um

i

thought

[ __ ] i lost my train of thought there

uh [ __ ]

it's it's that's how it is man i don't

know i don't know man [ __ ] internet

internet dynamics it's like i can't

explain [ __ ] to you it's good i can talk

to you because you have to like go

through it but like i never talk about

it like being uh subject to this sort of

[ __ ]

like to other people because it would

sound like i'm insane even though i'm

describing things that are like

perfectly real you know to like like

imagine like uh you go you're like

sitting like hanging out with like your

friend who's who like uh is like an

electrician or something

like so how's life going and it's like

it's like you know uh you know just uh

people uh trying to like hack into all

my accounts and uh post my information

on like a website that's uh solely

inhabited by like uh neo-nazis and uh

like uh

like hyper anarchists like leftists for

some reason both of them uh

here's the thing is like i just

i never thought of myself as such a good

person but compared to these people i

think i am because

what i struggle to do is i always try to

put myself in their head and be like why

are you doing this why do this like i

wouldn't even do this to someone i hate

like what is the re is this just like a

way of defying god

and just like testing

testing the limits of because to me

these are just things that are not

possible i couldn't spend my time on

twitter constantly [ __ ]

you know

i try to put myself in their head and be

like where do you where are you getting

this evil from where do you get that

from you know

where does that even come from where

does this hatred come from you know

well the funny thing is is that like it

is like uh like uh just from like a

bitterness and it actually is like it's

like a it's like a self-hatred

which uh manifests as like a desire like

for like the parts of the self that

would want to be like amputated or

whatever is uh like projected out into

the world so it's like you have to like

go out and like kill these things that

sort of represent like unacknowledged

parts what do you think i represent for

all i have you know my haters go

hardcore i have a lot of really hardcore

they just genuinely hate my guts

like what what is it that i represent to

them

do you think

uh the same thing that uh [ __ ] stalin

represented to all the [ __ ]

trotskyists in uh new york city

really

so it's like you think it's like a it's

like an edible thing like i'm like a

fatherly figure to them or something or

i like authority they don't want like

they like consensus they like democrat

quote-unquote democratic meaning

oligarchic consensus they don't like

authority they don't like seeing like

anyone speaking as if they have

authority or that authority like they

could that the authority comes from

their own understanding and not from the

consensus

okay i see i see

that this is what uh like um blake has

this in like the everlasting gospel

right where it says like he spoke with

authority not like a scribe you know

like he's not pointing being like like

they're they're like scribes right like

they'll go and they'll be like no the

consensus right it says in this part you

have to go point at the document and

then like you know you turn it into like

this like flow chart right we're gonna

make the consensus flow chart we'll all

agree to it but like what the what what

jesus jesus doesn't have a flow chart

he's just saying like i am the truth

that's so interesting that's so

interesting

um

i just don't know why you go out there

and you're like i'm telling you the

truth like you think people feel like it

is the truth you think people feel like

they either have to destroy me or like

um

just irrationally submit to me and they

just want to preserve their rational

faculties and that's how they're doing

it is by attacking me because i can

understand that it's like they're just

trying to survive basically they feel

like if they don't the thing is is that

your criticisms are criticisms of the

consensus so to diverts from the

consensus would mean that authority no

longer resides in the consensus if like

an individual can be right and the

consensus wrong

that throws

the

organizational principle of this like

what like a narco-syndicalist ideology

of

like loop like because that's they

believe effectively that uh like dem

democratic like selection or whatever

leads to perfect consensuses and that

there will never be like a situation

where the consensus is wrong and like an

individual on their own

correct

yeah um

their their dependency on the consensus

personally is

maybe that's just what they've attached

their entire sense of self to or

well the thing is is that you attach

your sense of self to this consensus

because the closer you approximate the

consensus that's like considered a proxy

for like your intelligence and also your

your moral good yeah you know i'll tell

you why it's it's i'm struggling because

i've been a leftist for 10 years so i've

been there done that for every single

thing you know pretty much almost like

i've been through all the tendencies and

i've i've been there i've been the ultra

leftism and the enthusiasm and the

edginess and the right i've been

everywhere right as a leftist

but i can never

search back into my past

um

and find the energy find like

any point of being able to be relate

relatable to the

haters i was never a hater if that makes

sense right

like someone who spends their time

harassing people and like

i i debate people and yell at them and

[ __ ] but then it's done and i move on

i don't

well there's also a difference between

like a type of like troll where you're

trying to elicit like a dialectical

response or whatever like if you like uh

you know what i mean versus one where

it's just like

[ __ ] you die like there's there's a

difference like there's a way to be like

to be like combative without being like

uh like trying to be like an

eliminationist or like a liquidationist

or something like one where you're

trying to invite like a repost so that

you can like read what's the meaning of

like this the screeching hatred of the

guy who tears his face off i never have

that feeling i've never had that feeling

in my life

you know what i'm talking about i mean

it's kind of it's kind of like an

autistic thing though like it's kind of

like uh like

wait on

cloak wheel i meant colloquial sense

like the way people use it on the

internet or whatever like like

meaning like the dominance no no you

mean like

you mean like uh like an automated

response like um

not not in the sense of like just people

with disabilities or anything like that

no no no no no no just yeah all right i

mean yeah i mean in the sense of like uh

like uh

a kind of attachment to a specific like

organizational principle or a specific

like world picture you know what i mean

where it's like yeah

like basically just like the the the

dislike of like change

really

yeah um like the dis the or the the fear

of change uh like a kind of pathological

fear of change actually i think drives a

lot of leftists which is kind of funny

um yeah

as they they actually don't want

anything to change

actually yeah

i want anything to really change

kind of want things to be as they are

except more so

yeah yeah yeah i i understand like um

that's very miserable to me that's very

sad but

conservatives

a real sense yeah it was that's what

they actually are designing the system

we have if you think about what

reactionary means aren't they the

reactionaries

objectively yeah yeah but

in a carnival upside down like mirror

universe where pretty much everything

means this exact opposite and this is

what you'd expect in like somewhere

that's like dominated by the antichrist

effectively is that it's like a

perpetual carnival where everything's

upside down all the time and then as

soon as you have like the camera obscura

like the view of like uh the like the

christian hermeneutic right you know

what is he used last year shall be first

there you know and then you can look at

america and flip everything upside down

and it's like putting on those they live

glasses you know so it's like who are

the fascists it's antifa you know

perfect like everything you can do with

everything yeah

people call me a contrarian but what i

think is that i'm just like looking at i

look at everything the latest upside

down the latest thing on twitter that i

saw was that

the patriotic socialists are going to be

the embryo of fascism in america and

that

we need to study the history of fascism

in italy and germany to stop paz and the

patriotic socialists because

they're mirroring the history of fascism

ironically like we were on like what we

tried to debate [ __ ] keith woods and

uh joel or whatever and they're the ones

actually trying to do that they're not

calling it communism they're calling it

like [ __ ] like labor nationalism or

syndicalism or some [ __ ] stupid

fusionism or what syndarchism or archaeo

future like they'll come up with some

[ __ ] name for it so

it's not even the same thing it's weird

it's weird to me because it's like

uh it's it's coming from the vows school

of um

of marxism according to which everything

that's not liberal is fascist

so if you if you defy the liberal

consensus that means you're a fascist

fascist

right but and also it's interesting to

me that there's they think there's only

one anti-fascist consensus the liberal

one

but the soviet union bore

by far most of the brunt of that war

so this soviet anti-fascism is

completely different than the western

kind

and for example lukashenko is in it

already talking this no one knows any of

this dude yeah where did that happen in

marvel i don't know what you're talking

about what marvel movie was that but but

here's the thing is that both putin and

lukashenko are anti-fascists right but

they're outside of western liberalism oh

no no no no they're they're fascists

according to these people

it's it's like why is there only one

anti-fascist consensus why what about

the soviet anti-fascists oh well is it

is joe biden a fascist i go yeah

it's like so did you vote for a fascist

like who isn't a fascist like you you're

just you

guys they're basically saying that

this is the straw man that's being

created the patriotic socialists

are

super enthusiastic and jingoistic about

american american imperialism yeah we

want we're super

what the f

it's like this is that's why i believe

in satan because

who else but part of life can can create

such a deception like anyone who like

i've spent my whole time on twitch

yelling at people

for being anglo imperialist

like

yeah

i'm just again i'm i'm puzzled i'm

stunned i don't even know how to respond

to it it's like

what the [ __ ] is going on it's like

imagine being framed in a crime and you

just

how are you supposed to respond you're

not guilty

dude this is uh

if you read dostoyevsky

i know but i'm familiar with like his

themes

[Music]

that's a big part of the brothers k is

that exact thing of uh that feeling

tfw that feel one but yeah i know what

you mean man i don't know it's something

it's kind of funny it's comical in some

senses like the uh the uh

the the hyperbole that exists on the

internet you know

like

yeah that tens of thousands of people

are like devouring the

communist patriotism or whatever it's uh

funny

if that has any bearing on like the

actual reality we live in

um

i'm so sick of being like an edible

father that has to be

primordially repressed in order to

create communities because that's

happened so many times my life where

like

i end

up

the i like people create communities

around hating me

i feel like that you know there is a

psychoanalytic for my federal um

uh agents that are after me whatever let

me give you a pro tip this was true in

like elementary school too this is like

a deep trauma i have it's like

friend groups

formed based on excluding me hating me

you know what i mean just feel like

that's still true entire communities

prop up just because

they

they just repress they're just

repressing the fact they hate me

but they can't justify it it's like the

one singular irrational point of

consensus that they just subconsciously

agree

two holes

uh thank you general

yeah um

uh

was it i would i don't think i i was not

i've never been like uh

i'm hated on the internet i guess but uh

that was kind of a novelty for me

yeah

generally well liked like

my whole life like it's funny like you

know with me it's like people people

genuinely either love me or hate me i

don't have anyone who's just like

indifferent you know like yeah yeah

yeah but i wish i did i wish i had

people that were just indifferent

it's kind of funny to me because that's

something that like people uh on the

internet try to like suggest is that

like uh you know i was like uh i was

like the nerd getting stuffed into a

locker or whatever and i was like

i was just i was pretty fine like it was

pretty you know

i was i kind of i miss at least uh

seeing like that many people that i was

friends with actually that's probably

the only part of no i swear it's scary

because

my internet presence has just become how

i was in elementary school

and part of middle school which was

i was neither the nerd

nor the popular kid i was in i was

always the controversial

guy who was like people i divided people

everyone was always divided over me like

you either love me or hated me

but i was just a source of conflict

that's what i was i always just started

conflict

i did that too too yeah yeah i feel you

i was i was never learning i was always

the one who like disrupted

the

like i would disrupt a friend group i

would disrupt

a social dynamic and people would just

be divided on me as haas or a complete

piece of [ __ ] [ __ ] him whatever or are

we loyal to him we like it's always it's

always i've always been a source of

division my whole life

yeah

i feel man um yeah i used to do that a

lot too

but i always like i thought it was fun

mine was mine was more like uh

man i was i don't know i just like uh

like a kind of uh

more of a troll i guess online back it

like years ago um but it was fun

i've always been a troll on the is for

as long as i've ever been on the

internet i was a troll all i did was

troll that's all i did when i you know

what you know um i never was a gamer

when i i had the video game consoles and

i had multiplayer exclusively to troll

when i even when i was playing was the

most fun yeah all i did was troll in

video games that's all i ever did and

kind of do you know what that sort of

represents it's something that i think

about a lot because it's like what i

like to do to do with video games was i

never liked to play the game that the

video game was but i like to like make

up a game yes absolutely absolutely and

that's exactly how it was absolutely

that's what i feel like is like yeah

that's the key yeah that's that's i know

i never played games dude i never

actually i never played games like based

on what the game was meant for i always

invented my own even halo like

one of the reasons i like yeah that's

why halo was beautiful the custom game

settings yeah that's i didn't even play

the matchmaking the halo was for me

theater mode forge and custom games and

all i would do is make my own games in

those things i would make my own things

right

and

um

yeah but no i was always a troll online

you know like when facebook first

started out in middle school

i made like 35 facebook accounts just to

troll my classmates like i would make

like every day i'd make a new facebook

account

and i would add

i would add everyone in my school and

just like

you know what i mean yeah and this was

facebook first launched this is when

facebook first launched right

and

um

yeah i mean like

uh in high school in freshman year like

um i had like a cousin that went to

school with me and i made a fake account

of like this like scary white guy

who was like bald that i put as the

profile picture so i'd made him look

like a skinhead or whatever

and i added them he was like my cousin

so he's arab or whatever and

i added him and i said that i was

i was transferring into the school and

that i have an issue with muslims or

whatever like just some [ __ ] like that

like just to scare him or whatever

that's the radicalization pipeline to

being uh a deus volt neo-nazi

state we just proved

to prove your in-cell origins of uh

doing

of creating sock puppet white

nationalists to to scare yeah i don't

know why i just confessed i don't know

why i just couldn't

but

god has um but you're on for that's

unforgivable no i mean i i told him like

a day later that it was me so i didn't

make i didn't have it go on too long but

that was a good bit started freaking out

but

yeah i mean

all i ever did was troll that's all i

ever did but i mean um

well trolling still like effectively

like that's that was uh why you got such

a big response you know because it was a

good troll it's not even a the best

trolls are telling the truth that's what

i always say that's like just telling

the truth is the greatest troll i feel

like twitter to me

i was trolling almost the whole time on

twitter but i was also invested in it

does that make sense

like everything i was doing was to

provoke people but also because

uh i felt like i was at war and i have

to win the troll war you know what i

mean

that makes sense

yeah no that was kind of a mindset that

was uh

that big part of like the 2000s to like

late to 2010's internet was this idea of

like

you know like cyber activism as being

like you know we're like freelance

intelligence agents like for the people

yeah

every day

was prank call every business every

hotel every st

i i would

yeah sometimes even when i was alone

just with no one there just for my own

sake i just

rank all this [ __ ] out of like everyone

all the time

i would prank all relatives i would

prank call like distant relatives

everyone i would prank call everything

um

growing up

and i feel you i was a bit of a

a bit of a troll myself i didn't do any

i don't think it

get up to that much stuff but

no i was like it was scary with me

because i was like fanatical about it it

wasn't even a

it's like uh

i i liked uh it was almost like i was i

was a demon or something you know

like the video of your video about a

dragon war

yeah you saw that that was

that was that was i liked that a lot

that was uh it reminded me of like

myself

i

was like a kid and stuff like that like

dragon war and like that's like so much

like a great metaphor for what the

internet's like i thought that whole

story

because it's like the the unintended

consequences you know

i'm getting a little tired here man but

i'm gonna eat some food and stuff but

this is really nice yeah yeah i gotta

use the bathroom too but

yeah good talk man

peace out man have a good one you too

see you later