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The and here to do to do to do to do

and here's to you, Mrs. Robinson,

Jesus loves you more than you will know

God bless you please This is Robinson

Heaven holds a place

For those are brave

Hey

Hey

Hey

Hey

Hey Hey

We like to know when you see what you're doing to watch your four our minds we like to help you love to help yourself yourself look around you

all you see

our sympathetic eyes

stroll around the grounds

until you leave it home

and here's to you

Mrs. Robinson

Jesus loves you more than you will know and here's to you Mrs. Robinson

Jesus loves you more and you will know

Whoa

God bless you please

This is Robinson

Heaven holds a place

For those you pray Hey hey hey and sun having holes a place where no one's afraid

hey hey hey hey

hiding in a high place where no one

ever goes

Put it in

your pantry with your

cupcakes

It's a little secret

just the robin

the suns are there Rose no secret just the Robin's the son's a bear

most of all

you've got to hide

it from the kids

coo coo-co-choo

this is Robert

sir

Jesus does him all

than you will know

Whoa

God bless you please

Missing Bradenton

Happy holds a place for host

pray

Hey

Hey hey

Hey Hey

Hey

Hey

Hey

Hey Hey

Hey Sade on the

So far

Sunday

After

I'm going to Count Candidate's debate To day afterno.

Go to the camp in these debate.

Love about it, shout about it, when you've got to choose.

Every way you look at the shoes where have you gone

and you know our nation

turns its lonely eyes to you

who

what's not you say?

Mrs. Robinson

Joe to Joe has nothing gone away.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Yeah. Hey, hey, hey. I'm going to be. I'm going to

I'm

I'm and you know the

I'm

I'm

I'm and you know and the uh...

uh...

uh... there's a lady who's sure all that clitor's score and she's buying

the stairway

to him

but when she

gets there she knows

if the stores

are on clothes

with what she can get

what she came through

ooh

and she's buying a stairway to him

there's a sign on the wall

but you want

to be sure

because you know

sometimes

words

have to me

in a

by the room

there's a

sunburn

who sings

sometimes all of

those

on this gift

I Makes me want to make me want to go. Oh, it makes you wonder

there's a feeling I get when I look

to the west

and my spirit is

crying for me

in my voice

I have seen

wings of smoke

through it from ours and the voice I have seen Wings of smoke Fruly trees

And the voices

are supposed

Stand alone

Yeah makes me wonder and it's whispered that soon

If we all call the two

Then the piper will lead us to Jesus

And the new day gone with those who stand along and the forest will echo with that thing I'm I'm

I'm If there's a bustle in your headstroke, don't be along now

It's just a spring clean for the main queen

Yes, there are too

past if you can go by

burning a lot

there's still time

to change the road

year on

you're and it won't go because you don't know

the piper's calling you the joint hand

dear lady can you hear the wind blow

and that you know

your stairway lines on the whispering man?

Yeah. and you know, and I'm I'm I'm going to and now and as now the one row down the road

our shadows

darling in a snow

there walks a lady

We all know

Come on one line and watch the show

I'm everything

Don't dance in here

And if you listen to

young

since you won't

come to you at last

when I want

I want to

see the I'm right When I want to cry Just be a lot Nothing one and she's buying the stairway to heaven.

No matter how hard I try

You keep pushing me side and I can't break through

There's no talking to you

It's so sad

that you leave it

takes time to believe it

but after all

is sad and up

you're gonna be

the lonely one

oh

do you believe the love at the love

i can feel something inside me saying i really don't think it's strong enough no. Do you believe in love at the love?

I can't say something that's sad to say.

I really don't think you're strong enough, no.

What am I supposed to do sit around and wait for you well i can't do that

and there's no turning back i I need time

to move on.

I need a love

to feel strong.

Because I've had time to think

through.

And maybe I'm too good for you.

Oh.

Do you believe in life after love? I can feel something inside you say.

I really don't think you're strong enough, no.

Do you believe a a lot of love?

I can't feel something that I'm saying

I said

I barely don't think you're strong enough, no,

and not no, and not know very close and so enough no enough no

enough know

enough know enough know enough no

enough no

enough no

enough no

enough no

enough no

enough know

enough know

enough no enough no

enough no Enough no Enough no The The The I'm I'm

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I'm trying. Oh, Oh, Oh,

my

Oh Oh I'm coming on

Oh

Oh

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I'm going to be. I'm trying to

I'm going to and uh...

uh...

uh... Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

Oh, oh'm running on.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I'm coming on

I'm coming on

Oh I'm trying to I'm trying to

I'm going to be. I'm going to be. I'm

I'm

I'm I'm telling you all. The I'm not. I'm

a

man and I'm not

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I'm The Yo, Midwest Sing, what's going on, man?

Appreciate the five banana.

How's it going?

And also, you other people sub today before the stream in for gray rise.

What's going on, guys?

Let's just get it going.

I don't want to do too long of a stream because it's late and the stream is probably not going to be that long this time around.

But what's up, guys?

Sorry I was late.

I was, um, had some cigars, a little bit energized, you know, non-alcoholic beer.

That was really fun.

But, yeah, I wanted to give you guys a stream since we didn't do one yesterday.

Also, I have some things in my mind I want to talk about and touch base on a few things with the community, maybe get in some depth.

You know, it's late night.

We have some more liberty to, you don't have to deal with the high attention span,

sorry, low attention span,

demographics and so on and so on,

and got a lot to talk about today.

Actually, let's get right to it.

In terms of news, I really don't have much for you. I'm sure things have happened, but I don't think I'm going to talk about them because let's just take a moment to chill for a second. And, you know, with some powerful themes we want to touch on today,

like religion and communism and so on and so on. And, um, but, um, to be honest

I've been thinking

and I've been thinking about

it's always on my mind

I'm always thinking about it

but

I've been thinking about

you know

high school you know, high school, you know, and I've actually never been somebody who adopted far right views,

you know, like these extreme right, whatever, the vapor...

It's so crazy, the vapor wave aesthetic and...

All that stuff, but I, you know, I'm thinking back to a time, very dark time in my life, in which, you know, I wouldn't say I was close to that, but I started to understand where that was coming from, and I was fighting an internal jihad if you will to understand

why this is a false path

you know

and

I look at today how

how widespread

it has become.

And there's some people, and you can tell these are bourgeois people.

These are people who are fundamentally bourgeois,

who are sitting in some coastal part of America, probably in some hipster, affluent, you know, urban enclave.

I'm not saying this to Stoke resentment. I'm just saying it's the truth.

Johnny, two-by-four, what's going on?

And, you know, these people are like, oh yeah, that's not widespread at all.

That's just like some fringe thing going on.

And it's like that it reflects such a fundamental isolation when back in 2013 2014 when i started to realize that this dark alt-right stuff was on the rise and marxists were not really in a position to be able to respond to it. And I really wanted to kind of spiritually cultivate the meaning of Marxism or communism and so on.

Because I wasn't part of any groups.

I wasn't part of any, like, trendy communities.

I wasn't part of any of these, like, you know, I wasn't part of a university, you know, that I was before a university.

I wasn't part of, like, you know, I was before a university, I wasn't part of like an activist group where you have a social incentive to signal in these directions. I had, I felt like from scratch, I wanted to derive the truth of Marxism, the truth of communism, and this specific tradition.

And back then, this alt-right stuff was extremely fringe, but I could tell that it was going to become widespread.

I could tell it would, because i could tell that this country the

youth of this country in particular are facing such a profound existential crisis they're they're

facing such a profound crisis of meaning, of resolve, of willpower, and so on, and

it's not just, oh, they lack a sense of identity and belonging, it's more like there is an extreme suffering that corresponds to the fundamental

impotence of human will in this specific era in America, with the rise of social media, with the rise of this sensory overload of mass media and digital technology and so on and so on, people do not know how to make sense of the suffering corresponding to the alienation, the unique alien, and not just the one that Marx was talking about, but a fundamentally unique form of alienation that is specific to this era, right, That it's specific to the information age. And it's an alienation in which

people are finding themselves traumatized by their inability to feel recognized.

And I'm not saying this like, oh, you know, people's feelings or it's much, recognition is so fundamental.

It's like, it's not just like a participation trophy. It's more like

there is a deep suffering of the human soul and the human spirit, which is not being recognized.

Outside TVS, what's going on, right? Which is not being recognized.

And when I say it's not being recognized, I'm not saying, oh, there's no comforting or consoling authority telling, oh, it's all going to be all right it's more in the sense

that it's like it's not being made sense of nothing is it's it's not being met with any

responsiveness in terms of what do i make of this what am i to to make of this? What am I to do with it? And people suffer in private. It's a private suffering. This is the essence of trauma, of course. course trauma is that which cannot be

domesticated by language if you will

and you know you look at these vapor wave edits and all these whatever little dark age nonsense things

and we like to laugh at them i laugh at them because they're so ridiculous

but it's always important to remember it's like there's such a profound impotence behind that.

There's such a profound overcompensation going on there as a consequence of people's inability.

They can sense they're losing everything. They're losing every sense

of will. They're losing every sense of resolve to continue living. They're losing every sense

any motivation to keep going, you know, keep waking up in the morning and just keep, what are they doing all this for, right?

I know I'm being very vague, but there's something about, let's call it the soul, the human soul. You know, you can be a Freudian and say it's the subject, but we could be the same thing. It doesn't matter. But there's something about the way in which that is being torn apart and de-territorialized in a new way in the information age, in the age of social media.

People's, you know, we look at these ridiculous trends among the newer generation, looks maxing.

They're literally taking hammers and breaking their faces to look

like something, I guess, that will make them feel like they will be... Men are undergoing a crisis

which women have been going through for much, much longer, but now men are, the age of social media is very curious. It's starting to make men feel like an emotion only women used to have, which is that they are not being recognized by the world, and they're not being validated, quote, so to speak, by it, because they don't look good enough.

And that's why they have this sense of alienation.

That's why they don't have that sense of belonging that they want.

That's why they don't have that ability to have a sense of place in the world, right?

They just want, there's no way their existence is being recognized.

And this, you know, I wouldn't call it neo-fascism.

But I wonder if I should, because it's like one of the things that are spurring these thoughts in me, I just think about things very holistically.

Is this, I'm starting to notice when I'm

on the toilet scrolling through TikTok,

there's these new

military ads

and it's got to be fed boosted.

It's just like no way it's organic.

But regardless, it's like

it's like the little dark age

edits, but it's like for recruiting for the military.

Like, oh yeah, you're so lonely and you've got all these fucking problems

and you're so tired of this

why don't you just join the military to

re you know

acquire this sense of adventure

and purpose

and camaraderie and

at least you know

you'll be a badass like in the movies.

You know, you can see that in the movies, you know, all these action heroes and all this war movies.

It's like, yeah, maybe that's where you'll discover the meaningfulness of life once again because you've lost it.

It's like

the typical

Nietzschean

crypto-fascist

idea that

it's like

this is the

era of the

last man

and the

only way to

reacquire the

meaning is

to go and join the military and you know even if it's not because it's for a higher cause or for a higher idea or anything like that it's just like the pure pure experience of war, meaningless war and death, destruction and so on, that's what's going to restore the lost sense of meaning.

And I, apologies if I'm babbling.

You know, I just had a cigar and I am, uh, I like to talk a lot when I have nicotine.

But what I mean by that is something very similar to the same nihilism in World War I that compels Mussolini to like abandon socialism and you know all the the the poetry of war this is the Italian futurist this is the context that incubated what would eventually become the essay fascists.

So

when I say I don't necessarily

think the alt-right

nonsense is fascist, I'm putting that with

a very strong

what is it?

Asterisk. Like, okay, it's, it's not just fascist because they're clearly, like,

using fascist symbolism and stuff, but the way that is being now united with military recruitment efforts and the way that's going to be

corralled into a new nihilism of going to die in World War III

to reacquire the sense of meaningfulness and recognition

we don't have in our hyper-alienated society.

That's where I think, actually, we could be talking about actual real return of fascism here or something something um similar to it at least right and um i think we should

be attentive to that fact.

And I'm pointing this out because, you know, you have to really think about what makes the

communist view different and the communist conviction different. It's like you can put it in

terms of the different pills to put this in meme, the meme lexicon. It's like, is it the black pill? Is it the

white pill? Is it this, or is it that pill?

All these pills have in

common is an immediate way

to respond

to this existential dilemma.

Whether it's a white one or a black pill

or whatever, it's like

which pill should you take and what if taking pills is the

problem in the first place what if every what if you just need to stop taking pills you know how come

no one's thought of that what if we are in this existential predicament

because we can't stop taking pills what if all we need to do is put the pills down and actually

risk what's out there.

Put the pills down and

plunge into this

oblivion that's before us

unconditionally, descend into it

with nothing but the faith that maybe possibly it's not a guarantee

something meaningful could arise out of that and um and that risk has to be taken, because if we can't embrace and take responsibility for the mess laid before us collectively,

and I'm talking about America here in particular, but in a sense this applies to the world, but especially for America, collectively, as a society, like we live in a society, right, like the Joker meme. But we created this mess, and we have to take responsibility for it and we all fear that we want to take some

kind of pill to feel like this can be existentially responded to actively.

But what if the opposite is true?

What if all we need to do to respond to this mess that we're in is in a sense,

don't take this literary, but in a specific sense, in a psychological sense, I mean, do nothing.

Stop looking for a way out.

Yes, the black pill is a way out.

It's a way to take a pill and then you're at peace right every pill is a way out

if we cannot emerge out of this oblivion based before us if If you don't know what I'm talking about,

by the way, turn off this stream and enjoy your life. Far be it for me to want to impose

problems on your life that are not there. So literally, if you have no idea what I'm talking about,

and you're like just totally fine,

you don't sense what this whole country seems to be sensing,

and you can't in any kind of way relate to the despair of this younger generation,

or the old, for that that matter turn the stream off and go live your life happily like literally i am not here

to create problems where there are none but if you think that what i'm saying is meaningful in any kind of way then the only hope we have is to be fully at the mercy of this terrifying and monstrous alien, on the other side of the literal alienation, there's this alien beast that we're all scared is going to consume us and devour us. And you literally need to just face it completely unarmed and totally be at the mercy of it and if you can't survive that kind of encounter if you can't survive that kind of encounter, then there is no fundamental meaningfulness of universal existence. Then there is no such thing as humanity. There is no such thing as meaning. There is, we may as well already give up,

is what I'm saying. You know, it's like, when I say, accept reality for what it is, it sounds extremely banal.

But if you understand that in the sense of like,

except the reality we're all trying to run from,

except that reality,

you know,

which is even more painful than a black pill. See, a black pill is something you take to feel the conceit that because I feel like I know that everything is meaningless and it's all despair and doom or whatever, I can at least be at peace with that knowledge.

But you don't even deserve that conceit. You shouldn't even have the comfort of that concede. You should have to

fully bear the pain that everyone in various different ways is trying to run from. And to be less

vague about exactly what that pain is um it's now in 2024 very difficult for me to

relate to it um personally because of how long my journey has been out of out of that right but it's important

we're able to relate to it because most people have not made it out, right? Most people are still in this kind of existential dilemma, you know? They're still in this kind of predicament, if you will.

You know, you look at all these people think, oh, it's just fringe. It's like it's not fringe it's absolutely not fringe

if you think it's fringe you are out of touch if you live in a um in any place in America that is outside of these like, you know, I don't know, corporate gentrified enclaves where there's just a bunch of hipsters, I don't know, climbing social careers, sorry, climbing, career climbing and playing leapfrog over each other with all these social games and whatever. Those are extremely socialized, bullshit, safe spaces, which are a very small minority.

Go to any flyover part of America. Go to any small town. Go to anywhere in America, which

represents the, even in urban places, go to the actual peripheral parts of these urban enclaves you know it's the same shit it's the same shit okay and what you'll find

is that young men

are being extremely

tempted by this

really dark

twisted

nihilism you know It's like what separates someone from becoming a pan

leftist versus, you know, becoming like an alt-right, um, alt-right like a freak little dark-age edits with the swastikas or whatever.

The only thing that separates is the degree of cultural socialization.

It's like if you are in a university where it's already a given that there's this

pre-established way of making sense of the world and making sense of your alienation, you're going to like, yeah, I'm to, like, hop on to this leftist bandwagon.

But if you're isolated from that and you're in, like,

these small towns where there's no

social capital to be gained

from any of that kind of stuff, it's kind of like,

well,

you know, the unfortunate thing is that it's extremely, extremely common and extremely tempting for young men to just like buy into this shit.

And why am I springing this up now? Because it's like, it's not, it's not just like buy into this shit. And why am I springing this up now?

Because it's like it's not,

it's not just like internet shit anymore, all right?

This is something that's being tapped into by the military

to get people on board for World War III.

And you know what's so fucking terrifying

about it? They're not telling

people, oh yeah, go fight for a

democracy. Like, you don't have to believe in it.

You know? Slava J, what's

going on? It's like,

you don't have to believe in it.

You don't. to believe in it you don't it's literally like uh hell divers it's like if you want the drama and the uh the excitement and the uh the poetic the poetry and all that stuff of war like all this whatever

it's like that's what they're looking for like look on tak tik tok and see how the military is

recruiting people now they're not telling you like like, oh yeah, fight for democracy,

fight for the American way. They're telling people like,

your life is really shitty and you're down in the fucking dumps.

So this is just a way, this is just catharsis.

Like joining the military, they're selling it like a form of catharsis, right?

Understand the profound suffering in this country.

People are facing that, this strategically viable for the Pentagon, you know, yeah, hard times

great strong men. Nonsense.

And, um...

J-Ska with the 10.

What's going on, man?

Appreciate you.

But it's like, man.

Um,

I really,

I really pity, you know, I pity this generation. And I'm not just saying I pity the people tempted by the far right stuff. I mean, look, at the end of the day, like, our pan leftist haters.

I mean, I'm not saying this to gloat.

I'm being real with you.

There's nobody that looks at infrared,

which is inspiring a message of hope amidst all of this and hates us without a very profound and deep deep suffering. I mean, these people,

and I'm not saying this to gloat, I'm saying this in all seriousness are really being tormented every single day and they are

suffering really badly. They are really, really suffering.

To the extent that it's like they're on the verge of suicide, you know?

And, um... that it's like they're on the verge of suicide, you know? And I actually pity them.

You may not believe that, but I actually do.

Like, I genuinely and sincerely pity them. I genuinely pity these people because

they are really, really, i mean you know you know in in the past when you in in the past when you hear someone say i pray for

these people it's like it's kind of such a meaningless thing to say,

because you're just like, what? You're, you're wishing for them to get better, but it's,

it's, I think there's something deeper about that, you know, like, I pray for these people. It's more like,

I have hope.

I have hope that they could find a way out of it.

And when you pray, what you're doing is you're not casting a spell and just wishing for them to get better.

It's more like you are affirming your own conviction that they don't have to be that way and that it is possible that they can eventually see that

and once you put it in those terms, like, it makes total sense, right?

Um, I feel like that's intuitively sensible for a lot of people, but, um, yeah, I mean, uh, yeah i mean uh all this like um all this stuff comes from a deep place of suffering.

And again, I'm not saying this to gloat.

But it's like, look at the Groypers.

Look at the America First people.

Again, I'm not gloating.

Like, this is coming from the, like, a very sincere place.

It's like, they'll never admit it because they can't, because it's like, I guess that's gay or whatever.

But, uh, you know how much those people were really, really suffering spiritually in very dark places?

Yo, Travali, what's up?

I literally saw one of those military edits and it said something like life is short.

Make someone else's shorter and it had like 300,000 lives.

That's what I'm talking about.

And it's like, but those groipers, you know, a lot of them were like isolated in school.

They were, maybe they were bullied.

Maybe they weren't.

They're just people, maybe their parents, there's problems.

They had fucked up lives. And it's like, this is their way of like, this is their way of getting out of that and escaping that.

And you know where that, that's coming from a really deep place of suffering, just profound

suffering, you know.

And I hope that I communicate a very different message.

I'm not here to help anyone escape from their suffering in the sense of giving them a pill that says you know this is your ticket out it's more like you have to confront authentically confront the source of that suffering

and not just

be at peace with it

but more like

be responsible

for it. Be responsible for

the meaning of it, You know? And to me, I'll tell you to be more specific what I think about that. I think that the, first of all, one of the most of the most painful experiences is when you realize your suffering is not unique.

Like you personally are not the center of the world.

But what your suffering is proof of, or moreover, what I should rather say is that the inability for

yours to find confirmation or validation or resolution is probably a better word, is that

out there, like, there are millions of people, to say nothing of the world,

let's just start with this country where we actually live.

There are so many people going through shit, and there's no way for them to make sense of it.

There's just no, no one is recognizing it or responding to it.

And it's not just for them personally, just collectively.

Like, collectively, there is no authority. There is no force in the world responding to it there's nothing

making sense of it and it's on a higher level than just like um personal grievance or personal dissatisfaction.

It's more like on a fundamental existential level

of how we are constituted

as a community, as a nation in america no one is recognizing or sorry not just no one there is no force

or no thing that is responding to or recognizing this fundamental

alienation that is being

inflicted upon the entire

country.

So it's like it's not personal.

Like it's not just you.

Um,

at the level of how through language we can make meaningful sense of the way people are being torn from their families, from their communities, from their loved ones, from themselves,

with all these identity crises people are having.

There's nothing that's addressing that. There's

nothing that's responding to that.

There's nothing that's addressing or responding

to the way, you know,

somebody is going into debt, taking on

this insurmountable debt,

and the way in which, you know, they're resorting maybe to crime, you know, to make money to supplement their income because they just can't pay the fucking bills or how it's tearing families apart because of the stress that's causing is so immense that people are coping with

it through alcoholism or drug abuse and not only is that tearing families apart at the level of husband and wife, but kids

themselves are suffering too, because it's like, put it this way, when a child sees parents

fighting, like, they're like, oh, you know, the parents must not love me because they're fighting, right?

Like, imagine that on a level of a country, you know?

It's like, we are the children in this country, and the state itself is going through a fucking divorce of some kind but not between like the states and the

federal government or something but more like between the state and civil society itself

the economic premises.

What I just said is extremely

extremely, extremely

abstract. Probably don't understand that.

But it's like

fuck.

It's it starts with the economics we know that as Marxists and then it tears families apart

and the dignity and the honor of families is being torn apart.

And women resorting to prostitution and only fans, men becoming alcoholics, drugs, you know, kids not knowing how to make sense of that.

Maybe they'll join a gang. Maybe they'll get involved with some bad...

Just all around, just bad fucking shit.

And then, it's like there's a whole new generation of young men, you know, the people that actually fight wars

who are there

and they're like, how the fuck

do we respond to that?

How do we make sense of that?

And so like this,

I don't know what you call, this alt-right

neo-fascist stuff. It's like a way to cope with that. It's like a way to project

this false sense of

of

invincibility and unconditional strength to compensate for the fundamental impotence they have in the face of this so uh so uh So, you know, it's like, you know, it's like, I don't, you know, you read about the late Roman Empire, or maybe the late Roman Republic for that matter.

And it's like the same themes, you know, which gave rise historically to Christianity. It's like when Engels talks about the origins of Christianity, I think this is in his,

his obituary to Bruno Bauer from pronouncing that right.

But anyway, Engels is kind of giving his own take,

his own description of the context in which Christianity emerges.

Amila with the five, wow, wow, Emil Emil with the 10. What's going on?

Amila, thank you so much. Appreciate it. Um, but no, but he's basically like, uh uh he's basically in that context he's talking about how tired people are exhaustion

you know exhaustion is such a prominent theme people have, their spirits have been just defeated because as a result of the Roman conquest, just breaking up the traditional forms of angles called them national authority

it's not exactly

the correct term

but you get it

the more local

forms of authority

and culture

and then

meanwhile

as a consequence

of the corruption

of the

republic and the

empire

even the noble patricians no longer believe in its ideals. I mean, everyone is so fundamentally tired and exhausted. And it's very, very much so eerily similar to the atmosphere in America today when you think about it, you know?

But... but um yeah i mean the thing about you know i've long made peace with the fact. And I think about, you know, this is such a raw stream.

Like, I'm being very candid with you.

Because usually I'm very cold and professional.

But then I realize, you know, a lot of my viewers, they're not on my level.

So I can't take that for granted.

So I'm not saying that as an arrogance thing.

I'm saying that as like a some of you out there may not be

as confident in this so that's why i'm squaring with some of you right now you know leveling with

you but what i'm trying to say is the communist pill is so tough to swallow because it's not a pill at all it's like the absence of a pill it's when you're you're not taking one anymore and you're going cold turkey.

And you're so tempted to reach for a fucking pill.

Just like a fat person is trying to diet.

But there's a donut right there.

And it's what's one donut?

Right?

What's one donut?

How do I know this diet I've been dieting I was 210 pounds I'm 175 now all right I know the

struggle so I'm not saying this to just attack the fat people out there.

But you go cold turkey on this pill taking, and it's so painful.

There's so much pain that comes with that.

Yeah. much pain that comes with that. Because what it does is it destroys the coping mechanisms we have as individuals,

as individually constituted egos, you know um as uh curated consumer identities you know it undermines the integrity of that.

In, I like to think that in the French school, they call that the decentered subject.

You know, that's what the Lacanians will call the decented subject. Just this

way in which the individual, um, the sense of individual self is just so fundamentally

undermined

by the fact that there are

these

wild and

destabilizing processes

which threaten

the in processes which threaten the integrity of its coherent

coherent appearance in our ego right so it's like um the painfulness of just not taking any pills is basically like you throw yourself

at the mercy of just being like a fucking nobody, like having no identity, being nothing at all, and just facing the fact that you are not unique in the way that, for example, the algorithms think we are, or, sorry, interpolate us as, you know, like...

You know, the biggest example of

egotistical delusion today is like

somebody who's like watching a YouTube video

and then gets an ad for like a pickup truck

and they're like, you know what?

I was just thinking about pickup trucks.

What a coincidence.

The universe is responding to me and recognizing me.

And it's like, no, dummy, that's being tailored to you because the fucking YouTube knows your browser history or knows what you've been your phone is listening to you it's not a

coincidence you know the universe isn't responding to you you know it's like it's tailored to be

toward you uniquely in that way i guess i don't know if that makes sense to you guys, but it's like the sense that somehow all universal

existence is responding to us uniquely, that we are the subject of universal existence.

That's probably the better way of putting it the ego

we have according to which which interpolates us or which reflects in us the assumption that we are the the addressee and the subject of all universal existence uniquely

becomes fundamentally undermined when we stop taking pills.

That is worse than all of the right wing fears about communism and oh my god it's going to be the red army is going to come and rape everyone and you know oh my god

it's going to be the white race

will be destroyed and immigrants will run

wild on the streets eating everyone

in cannibalism like

all these fears they have of a dystopian

apocalypse and the breakdown

of order

those infant of a dystopian apocalypse and a breakdown of order those infinitesimally approximate but never in an exact or absolute way this fundamental horizon of just nothingness, which is worse for them, the nothingness beyond the threshold of this imaginary order, let's call it, in Lacanese, That is more traumatic

than these kinds of scary

fantasies they have

of the dystopia

It's the nothingness they're scared of it's just pure complete destitution if you will of the imaginary form of the cadres, the creation of dedicated communists, the difficulty is how profoundly psychological it has become.

How much it's necessary to maneuver these different labyrinths of mass media and social...

I mean, they didn't have this problem 100 or 200 years ago, you know?

To be a communist back then, I mean, it was a lot easier.

You just had to read books.

You can't just read books today, because why?

Because there's TikTok and all these other different ways in which the universe is communicating to us

within our, within our, um, various different constitutive fantasies.

And it's like that, all of that has to somehow be maneuvered through you know and um But see, there's a false way of articulating communism, which is the pan-leftist way,

which is that you just absolve responsibility, existential responsibility.

When I say responsibility, I mean in a sense of responsivity.

Like, you absolve the necessity to respond to this problem just by deferring it.

Oh, it's not me.

It will just be us as a collective.

I'll just defer it.

So it's this endless kind of way of

deferring a confrontation

by huddle...

Let's all huddle together and hold hands,

guys. And that way,

you know, we don't have to face anything

at all

because, well, we're together. we could just kind of face each other because

we're in a fucking circle jerk right that's pan leftism but i think the collective subjectivity that is

implied by communism is radically different than that. I think it's more like a type of wisdom you can acquire.

And only a minority of people will ever be able to acquire it, I think.

Communists are always a minority.

But it's a type of wisdom according to which the adrecy of universal existence is some kind of social being and your involvement

and your relationship to that social being is fundamentally indirect it's not the immediacy of holding hands with a bunch of people together, or being in some kind of circle jerk, or, you know, like being in a DSA or something. But it's this, it's almost like you're a total buddhist who it takes nothing personally at all

and you recognize the wisdom of the masses you recognize the wisdom of the wisdom of something that is occurring at a historical scale, of the social relations of production.

This is not about your direct personal relationship, how that factors into your kind of desires and fantasies and so on. But it's a recognition of how the people, how humanity is objectively, already constituted historically and socially and more importantly collectively.

And this is what it means to recognize civilizations.

And that's not personal.

You are an agent interacting with that social being in a scientific way by acquiring an

impersonal knowledge of it based on a curated interaction with it.

And what is the organ of that curation? That's a communist party. That's what the party is. It's a way to get a pulse on the collective existential and material reality of a historically constituted people, a nation. It's not a way to directly solve your own

directly solve your own existential predicament. That's not what it is. It's something that comes after you've already

solved your own problem and are ready to just kind of act as an impersonally act as an agent of history.

And I think that's a lot tougher.

I think that's a lot tougher than what a lot of other people are offering.

You know, I think that's much more difficult

to swallow, if you will. I think the scandalous truth of communism,

what makes it so tough to swallow is it's almost saying,

it is saying directly, directly like the evils and the horrors of what capitalism has

done to humanity were necessary that was necessary to reveal something fundamentally true about the nature of universal existence and history itself.

Like that was necessary.

All of that suffering was a symptom of a deeper truth.

One that isn't personal. That's a really tough pill to swallow.

One that isn't personal, but which simultaneously renders your personality redundant.

It accounts for and integrates your personality indirectly, but it's not a direct

relationship. I mean, you know who understands this was Deng Xiaoping. This is the lesson he had to institutionalize in china after the spiraling of the

cultural revolution where the red guards are searching for a way to make history personable and meaningful to them directly at the level of their direct personal lives and their experience.

The Red Guards are foregoing all of the personal desires, all of the personal sense of selfhood all of this kind of

uh personal fantasy and immediately trying to realize the truth of communism

and history and civilization

or whatever universal existence

yada yada yada and then denchalping

is just saying

no we're going to have socialism in 500

years sorry we'll have communism

in 500 years he Sorry, we'll have communism in 500 years.

He's not saying that.

Of course,

literally.

But the sentiment is like,

he's saying it's not personal.

The scale at which

this is occurring, you are not the unique subject of that at the psychological level

at the level of your fantasies and at the level of your desires let's say you are not the subject of that process. It is happening regardless of you.

You know, just like a tsunami in the ocean will happen. I could be on a boat the waves will go as they go i don't control the waves

i'm on this boat i am not the addressee of the waves i am not the subject of those waves they will flow

in whatever direction they flow and all I can do is submit to that fact.

And in a sense, this is the profound wisdom of Deng Xiaoping in relation to communism. It's not that we don't have any responsibility for it.

We do, but it's not direct at the personal level. It's indirect. It's like what Mark says. We're doing it, but we don't

know it. Men and women make

history, but not as they please.

I mean, you and I right now

are a part of history. We are part

of the mode of production. You

and I are participating in the constitution of a social being right now.

But do I have direct access to that fact?

Is that directly immediate to me and my desires and my fantasy?

Is it direct one for one?

No, it's profoundly indirect.

At the level of my cellular reproduction, at the level of my metabolism, you think I have a direct relationship to that?

No, as I'm talking to you right now, there's a whole bunch of bullshit going on in my body, which I don't even understand, but it's happening anyway.

And I am not the addressee. I am not the subject of that process, at least as far as what I can

reduce to the form of my fantasies and my desires and my aspirations and my words and my language.

It's simply happening.

Is there a relationship between my thoughts and my sense of reality and all these other processes that are occurring, absolutely.

But it's an indirect relationship.

It's not a direct relationship.

It's indirect.

It's intelligible to me in a way that i cannot control but which i am nonetheless

fully culpable in by virtue of my existence and my being right and that is also true um that is also true uh for historical processes as well not just biological ones Thank you. You know, it's, um...

It's, um...

It's not a black pill.

Because at the end of the day,

reality is reconciled.

It's already resolved.

It's already meaningful.

It's not that, oh, you know, you don't have the privilege of that conceit of a black pill.

What I'm talking about is more painful to accept than a black pill.

Because what it relinquishes is the sense of control and sovereignty the bourgeois subject has over reality.

And then what happens?

You're thrown at the mercy of something fundamentally alien,

something fundamentally beyond the threshold of familiarity to you.

And Marx recognized beyond that threshold, not within it, but beyond it, precisely beyond it,

exactly humanity, exactly

what humanity is. That's Marx's

humanism.

Marx's

saw the human

in the alien.

He didn't recognize the human within some kind of pre-established familiar, you know,

horizon of familiarity.

Precisely the thing that we're most terrified of and scared of and which traumatizes us,

that is where Marx recognizes humanity.

You know, what they call in psychoanalysis, they're real, right? what about the power of the individual

you know

it's not that when I'm talking about

undermines

the existence

or the reality of

I should rather say the reality of the individual

what communism undermines

is not the reality of the individual, but the imaginary individual, right? It undermines the false projection of individuality where it does not exist only when you go through the whatever the buddhist nonsense ego death, whatever, Reddit loves

talking about it when they take mushrooms.

Only when you go through that, though,

can you act as an individual?

That's you as an individual in the real.

That's not your sense of individuality. That's not your conceit of individuality. That's not your

ideal self. That's not your ego of an individual. That is really your individual place in reality,

which is acting and intervening.

The real individual is something very different than the imaginary one.

The imaginary individual is what compels zoomers on tic-tok to grab hammers and smash their faces to look smacks

that's the that's the uh that's not them acting as individuals. That's them acting on behalf of falsely, falsely articulated collective fantasies disguised

as an

individual

fantasy

right

see the terrifying thing about communism

for American individualist ideology

just in the 50s in the red scare

is that the communist individual is an individual of the real. I mean, think about the basic McCarthyist paranoia. It's always a fear that your neighbor or your colleague at work or this guy, this individual, this person, this agent, this actor, a fundamentally individual person, is doing things and acting in ways that are ultimately fulfilling this alien and foreign subversive interest, the communist cause.

But that's the individual of the real. That, you know, communist saboteur is maneuvering across the societal and social fabric, basically intervening in various different ways, making friends, networking, going along, playing the role in society, but ultimately as this kind of outer space alien who has an agenda

that is like so radically

foreign to us

but that's the real individual

that's real individuality

that is

that is

that is a radical abstraction from a conventionally or a conventionally established form of community and sociality, you know, disguising as someone who looks like us but is not us, right? That's like the neighbor that Jesus tells you, love thy neighbor.

He's talking about that neighbor.

The neighbor who is really a communist space alien in a human disguise.

You know, that's a real individual. Yeah. in a human disguise, you know?

That's a real individual.

Or, for example, a real individual are the guerrillas in the CPUSA doing Takea?

They're looking like red libs. They're talking like red libs. They're indistinguishable from red libs. They're familiar to red libs. But they're not that. They're exercising a degree and an extent of agency that makes them fundamentally individual.

Fundamentally individual.

Thank you. usual. Thank you. I think one of the most I think one of the most profound insights you can acquire in life is when you start to realize that the...

The temporal plane of experience, how you experience time in your own head, like in terms of your own thoughts, when you're talking to yourself, is radically different and separate from the temporal time from the

time scale

in which

you actually

exist in

reality.

Like,

you are,

put it

this way.

Like,

you know

those

science fiction

stories? put it this way like you you know those uh science fiction stories or those scenarios

where it's like ah i zoned out for two seconds thinking about something but five thousand

years has passed in reality or like like, I had a dream.

I went to sleep, had a dream, and I woke up, and five thousand years passed.

Right?

And there's something actually real about that.

We experience an illusion of time in terms of how we experience it subjectively, but the scale in which there is an actual sequence of events

happening in reality is a separate dimension of time it's not the same one it's not the same one.

It's not the same one.

And when you, there's something very, I feel like that's all Eastern philosophy stuff.

Like, that's this kind of Buddhist stuff. It's like you are in reality,

but you have to be at peace with, like, actual reality.

Real reality is just kind of like dancing through the void. And you're here up in your head,

and you need to, you need to like synchronize the two just by profoundly being at peace with that fact meditating and whatever

um not getting carried away in your thoughts in such a way that causes suffering by

radically insisting

upon the separation

between the two. In Buddhism

that's basically the source of suffering, right?

And it's like, you know how people say, like, when they're, like, 60 years old, and they, like, see,

you know, maybe someone they haven't seen in 30 years, and they start crying because they're like,

wow.

You know, one day I'm 25 and then I wake up the next day and I'm 60 years old.

And it's like, the terrifying thing about that is it's like you don't experience that change.

You never really experience the gulf that separates you from 40 or 20 years ago or 30 years ago.

You never experience it.

It's really true. One day you just wake up and it's like

here I am you know time flies why does time fly though it's like it flies because

it flies because because how we subjectively experience time in terms of our consciousness, our thoughts is not the same

as what's going on in actual reality.

I'm not talking about metaphysical dualism, so don't get it twisted.

There is a relationship between the two.

Thoughts are rooted in these material processes.

But the trouble and the significance of dialectics in the first place comes from the fact that they are still discontinuous.

They are discontinuous in as much as reality itself is dialectical.

And reality itself is not one continuous form, but itself changes itself is defined by the way it is in radical contrast to itself right but the same is true in terms of our desires, our fantasies, our thoughts, our dreams, and what's going on in actual material reality.

There is a discontinuous

point between

these such that the relationship

between the two is indirect

so this is why time flies it flies because relationship between the two is indirect.

So this is why time flies.

It flies because,

because,

um,

put it this way,

our imaginary self is not synchronized with our real self my ego is not this is a way that it makes sense of it my ego is not synchronized with what I actually am

biologically

if you introduce

the scale of time.

No one's this.

When I'm 50 years old,

I'm still going to be

the same damn cocky self

that I am now.

You know, I'm still going to be the same me.

And maybe I'm wiser, so that won't be the case for me.

But how many old people do you see, you know, at the beach looking in the mirror yeah I still got it and it's like a

65-year-old guy who really doesn't have it but they they it's not like it's not like the

fact that they physically aged has made them aware of that fact it has it's still

the same person you know there's something really scary about that fact that you start to

realize when you age i think i mean I haven't got there yet, but... But isn't it so cathartic to be at peace with that fact that our real self is actually collective?

Like my real self is part of something collective. I'm part of history. I'm part of the material relations of production. My

subjective self, my thinking consciousness

is not fully

synchronized with that.

I can't just change reality because I thought about changing it.

You get what I'm saying?

I can only respond to changes that are already happening and recognizing them.

And Marx's purport is that the change between the capitalist and the socialist mode of production is something already happening, and he is electing

the courage to be responsive to it. He's responding to something

already happening. He's not saying, I

idealize this, and this is how reality

should be, and we should

fulfill

through voluntary

action, this

idea I have in my head. he's saying, I am being responsive to a crack in

history itself. I am recognizing this rift, and I am rendering it intelligible by recognizing the transition into the socialist mode of production.

Is this difference in East and West? I mean, I think in the East, I guess there are traditional, historically traditional ways of making sense of this fact, that it's a given for for many people but

what the west does is it imposes upon us the challenge and and the question such in such a way that you cannot fall back on these conventionally and

traditionally established ways of recognizing, for example, the relationship between individual and society and civilization.

For example, look at the Greeks and how Alexander destroyed the Persian Empire.

The Persians could not just fall back on destroyed the Persian Empire.

The Persians could not just fall back on the thousands and millennia years accumulated wisdom

of the Acadians and the Sumerians and the Assyrians

and the Phoenicians and the Egyptians and finally the Persians

and the Babylonians and finally the Persians, they couldn't just fall back on that. The Greeks posed

a fundamental question. I'm not putting these in materialist terms, but I'm simplifying it for you.

Which they were at a loss, initially at least, in terms of being able to respond to.

Now, the same is true for the West in colonialism. The same is true for America

with regard to the world, at least until now, where the world is finally

reasserting kind of traditional existence over the challenge and question America has imposed upon the world.

But how does the West impose, and what question am I talking about to be more precise it's more like

the West imposes upon the world a kind of an extent of subjective will, an exercise of subjective will, that was previously thought to be, that was unthinkable before, that was incomprehensible before like that it's possible to do things in ways that circumvent longlished traditions and conventions and so on and so on, which open up a horizon and which open up an extent of subjective activity and action the relationship to actual material reality is not yet clear.

For example,

in Western colonialism the west engages in many of these various horrific acts

and it's like how do we situate these evil acts

acts which lead the Chinese and

Asian they call them the white devils they're doing

all these horrific things because it's just incomprehensible

the total disregard for honor

doing the unthinkable like how do you situate these acts within some kind of material reality that renders them commensurate and harmonious with, you know, the deeper patterns of being and of universal material existence.

In Marxism, kind of...

...comes and... comes and initiates that process of reconciling the crime of the West, a crime which was also necessary, not the crimes of colonialism, but of the crime of modernity and industry and all these other things that are irreversible.

Modern science and so on.

Um... modern science and so on um and situates that within a kind of horizon of uh not a horizon situates that within a

an impersonal

kind of material and historical

existence and reality

according to which this is the capitalist mode of production this is a mode of production

you know this is not just the actions of this or that person or these are not the result of the

acts of great men or these are that ideas but

this is a mode of production you know you know in a sense you know many people would argue like a Freudian psychoanalysis

um is just kind of rendering scientifically intelligible these various esoteric and mystical

um

wisdoms and insights about human nature and whatever

but it's kind of also true for Marxism insights about human nature and whatever.

But it's kind of also true for Marxism.

Marxism is kind of rendering scientifically intelligible. This hitherto existing and diverse in content, Eastern Wisdoms, which kind of establish the relationship

between the subjective individual and this kind of deeper fabric of material being and material reality.

It's like historical materialism in, I don't know, in the Ming dynasty is kind of a given.

Like, yeah, they're like, of course, you know.

I don't, I can't just use my individual will to affect the outcome of history.

History, things will go as they go, as they have all, you know, whatever, some kind of traditional understanding of

their civilizational reality that, however mystical and superstitious, nonetheless situates it and

recognizes it

as material

and objective

right

anyway

guys I just

wanted to do

a quick stream

we went way

longer than

we were intended

but hopefully I'll see you Sunday and once if you guys like just wanted to do a quick stream. We went way longer than we were intended.

But hopefully I'll see you Sunday. And once if you guys liked this stream, I wasn't even planning a stream, but I was like, you know what? I want to give something to my gorillas

to walk away with. You know, I haven't been streaming a lot recently

there's a lot of work being done

you know I want to

uh Because, you know, I thought about it, and I'm like, you know, the thing that I feel like that separates infrared from everything else is kind of like shit like this you know it's like it's like it's actually being it's like thinking a little bit

not just thinking like in an intellectual, um, abstract or academic way, but like, actually, like, let's

wait a moment and like think through this shit, you know, like, instead of fucking watching

little dark age edits and getting carried away coping and taking all these different fucking pills, it's like, how about we recognize this first and foremost?

You know, it's like, and by this, I'm talking about this kind of like spiritual crisis

facing

that's spiritual and civilizational

whatever crisis you you know,

that's being thrown on America and the world at large, I guess, by extension.

Anyway, guys, yeah, I'll see you guys Sunday, hopefully.

See you all later.

Bye-bye.